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This is already a thing, just check the coder chat channel.

That's another reason why even the most competent security team can get easily trashed by competent shadowlings. As you mentioned, shadowlings can get dozens of thralls in the first 20 mins if they're competent. By the time shadowlings have double digits, security should really just start doing buckshot deconversion, and hiding the bodies so the lings don't use their 60s cooldown revival on them. If it gets to a point where security channel goes completely dark, it'd be very safe to just field execute officers without mindshields. Wordlessly stunning and thrall checking people with masks should be more common once lings get a foothold. More field executions should take place when it's clear shadowlings are winning. You'd start seeing the rounds with competent shadlowings actually lose if such practices became standard. Mass conversions don't work well with the servers current hugbox atmosphere. Expecting security to deconvert everyone for the sake of a safe environment isn't very realistic, and will just result in the station getting steamrolled if the antags are competent.

In order to make newscasters and the news channel more interesting for the crew, my suggestion is in adding some sort of header, where a news channel author can add when making a article. This way, a news channel author can give a quick summary of their article or bait crew members to see it. Something along of the lines of: "Breaking news from Librarian Reporter: Monkey outbreak in Medbay!" "Breaking news from Librarian Reporter: Insane Roboticist goes missing!" "Breaking news from Librarian Reporter: Captain, a Changeling or Human?!"

RIP, it's been a while since I've work on this... Introducing the Head of Security Gloria Church An out of date crew record of her can be found here

I'd just like to say hi and thank you for being such a great community to join. I tried playing SS13 on other servers and I was lost, and was about to give up but decided to try one more time and stumbled onto Paradise Station. It's been a great experience I now get what I am supposed to do, thanks mainly to a couple of people and especially mentorhelp. Mentorhelp really has been useful I am not sure if other servers have it but they really should. See you all online:)

I'm an idiot, then. :')

In general, it's a good practice to take a second to shove your patient into a body scanner and give them a quick once over after surgery. It takes only a few seconds to do, and makes sure you didn't forget anything and that no infections occurred.

Fuck rev. That's all

I really do enjoy rev on TG, but I can't see it working on paradise. For instance, it would take a while for everyone to get used to and become skilled at the rev gamemode. For security, it requires being absolutely ruthless, such as tazing and implanting people on the spots in hallways or harmbatoning revs to death if they outnumber you in combat. The playstyle required to win against a revolution doesn't fit very well for paradise at all, as it requires tossing SOP out the window and powergaming rather hard, and avoiding RP in general. The reason you see revs stomp every single time on paradise is because the security players are so spooked of getting bwoinked over not faxing CC, gunning some greyshirt down in the hallway for having a stunprod, wordlessly implanting, etc. I can easily see admins banning sec players over trying to do the bare minimum for surviving a revolution, as it so drastically draws away from the usual standards for security.

> Officer Ford on duty > Start with regular patrol > Come across a 10 mm clip in maint > tape off the area and call detective > patrol some more > CMO office broken into >tape off the area and call detective, detective is busy due to some monsters in cargonia > patrol some more > Sci chem broken into > at this point def EOC afoot, so I go to investigate science. > Check the server room because blood > Borg lets me in and tell's me that QM has been making some strange requests, like plasma canisters. > QM is suspect as fuck at this point > I Go to cargo to investigate, some technicians let me in and QM bolts for the cargo room. > QM says "NOTHING TO SEE HERE", and closes the door. > I demand he opens. > He opens, where I can fully see a shooting range. Full of flamethrowers and pneumatic cannons. > I ask for paperwork to approve this dangerous shooting range made on company time > QM runs to ATM and drops me 500 credits > We agree that paperwork checks out. > patrol some more > get gibbed by antag out of nowhere

Last time I tried to get the barber to reverse an inappropriate dye job, they wouldn't truly listen to the Captain. Let alone the HoP. Someone ranked under the HoP... I don't imagine anyone in Service would pay them any attention... unless they had the authority to actually fire people from the Service department. Putting people 'in charge' without actual, direct, 'they can fire you' authority, simply does not work.

First time in my life when i don't understand the post, please explain I'm getting brain blemishes. WHAT DOES HE WANT???

I don't say that flash shouldn't work like they do on cyborgs(This is needed), but disabled camera could prevent that. Blinded cyborg is weak enough, it's extremely easy to escape from him, it is unable to hit anything with disabler/laser/other projectile, can't identify hostiles etc. It's hard enough to disable camera, that action takes 3 clicks, cyborg needs to know before that his opponent will use flash. This is still just as easy as before to deal with cyborgs.

Personally, I feel the gateway should be “unknown”. You go to the gateway to explore strange new worlds, it’s not really exploring if you know everything before you get there!

It was pretty cool my first time playing Warden. Shift begins and things are quiet so I head to get a haricut from my favorite foul mouthed barber. Immediately after I step out with my new cut the AI bolts the chinese restaurant with a guy in there shirtless and in laser tag armor. I don't know what the charge was against him but I asked him to come with me to processing so we can ask some questions. He complies and follows uncuffed into processing where I ask if we can search him, again he complies. Turns out he had two emags, a minibomb and an energy dagger. Then began the fun part. He gets permabrigged which was immensely more satisfying than an execution or borging. I visit him from time to time and we play basketball and pass the time shooting the shit. I brought him a jacket, a guitar, food and booze and tried to make sure he was as comfortable and able to have fun as possible while confined. During his time in the brig he played a lot of chess, tended a garden (which he gave me an apple from) and wrote a memoir about being a syndicate traitor. Eventually I got him paroled so we can play Nanomob Go! but then the shuttle got called thus ending our fun. Don't be afraid to commit crimes y'all, prison is super fun!

This was during my Brig phys round when changlings was turning people into shina hoonkins. I start out by doing the Brig bay run, breaking into the old maint surgery to nab the stuff inside for the brigbay (I nearly lost the IV Pole to a greedy Cargonian looking for stuff to sell off) After setting up the Brigbay neatly I usually parouse through peoples medical history on the medical laptop in the brigbay (I'm creepy yes, knowing all your medical secrets), anyway after a good amount of reports of people being turned into vulpkanins (Klees left the station with a lot of wives that round) I decided to ask the warden for a lethal weapon to defend myself with which they gave me. And so time passed I decided to pop to medical to get some more supplies, apon returning to my brigbay it is covered in blood and the security team was ATTEMPTING to remove a changlings head (Squashy) using my surgery kit, whom escaped via the disposal bin ( I had disabled the pump and such earlier, so it means they activated it while I was away getting medical supplies.) After cleaning up my beautiful brigbay, for some reason a changling attempted to kill the warden and failed, attempting to escape I rush out with my Lazer gun and we both, begin to kill it, after killing it the WHOLE security team rushed to brig and begin attempting to slash its head off (I had no knife but I was using my Vulp claws in attempt to behead it, being a vulp is beautiful in that way) After a good while, the head wasn't coming off, so I dragged it straight into my brigbay, plopped it on the table and began attempting to amputate the head, while security was yelling at me to hurry, after several failed attempts due to buggy surgery prep, I eventually behead the beast as security walk out like there was no problem ( I was furious from the constant bombardment from security as I attempted something stressful!) TO relieve my fury, I decided to gut the changling medically by removing its organs (except the appendix, aint touching that) and removed its brain from the bodyless head, putting the brain into my backpack. After a while I eventually escaped on the security escape pod, only for mike Murdock to stab me with a UE+UI injector of his DNA, turning me into a charcoal version of Mike Murrfox That's my story.

My never ending quest to get this man Occuline ended in my own death. I saved him from crit after borgs shocked all the doors near escape and AI sucked all the air out of the rooms. Put on his breath mask and injected him as I myself was closer and closer to crit myself. Finally passed out and he started shaking me, but I wouldn't wake up. He ended up dying too I think. Was a very over-the-top dramatic performance. Also this bit of luck: First try and I get 10k...

Hello, I am the one know as Shazbot, but also Shazbot194, or probably more famously by P.A.T.C.H. I am here to show you my new art. It took me quite a long time to find this style. I am not taking requests, but I am taking suggestions if you are burning to have me draw your snowflake. P.A.T.C.H. getting her ID picture taken. L.A.D.Y. and R.Os.E. on a late night date. Aurora's birthday FuF and Peppy at a bar Kaizen and Emily-5's movie night

Patch and ELO watching a movie.

The cute couple of JRO and LUMI

Guess i'll add in one from a few months ago: I started out as an engineer trying my best to learn the job. I was in the assembly line room to figure out how to fix it, then out of maintenance comes some spectral man in purple robes. Unaware of who, or what he was, I assumed danger and tried to run, but he was faster. I got stunned, dragged screaming for help at my location over comms, sent into a cult teleport rune under a table, and converted into a cultist. Security didn't respond, or really even notice anything. I was back walking around the station like nothing happened. Now it was probably a bit more than an hour into the round, and things were starting to get hectic. Cultists had several teleports, and were summoning ghosts and building constructs en-masse. The final objective: Find, capture, and sacrifice security officer Reylaigh Young. After learning how to function as a cultist, I teleport down to see most of Security is mounting a full-on assault on a cult teleport rune hidden in a secret room just above the HoP office; sec is in full riot gear and durands, against cult spectres and constructs, it was messy, probably a bit excessive. I end up finding our target, informing the cult of her general position, and tail her until she gets distracted by two constructs in the engineering hallway. I do the typical stun and drag, the target is screaming my name and her position over comms. The target gets successfully teleported to the cultist base, but before I could teleport myself, a single sec officer finally responds to the call. I try to run, but fumble for my emergency teleport paper. I get tazed, and in a frantic dance of button mashing and confused clicking, end up teleporting somewhere completely randomly. I teleport to the cult room the sec was assaulting not 5 minutes ago. All the runes are still intact, the room is just covered in blood and corpses. Despite at least 3 officers patrolling outside, I meander out the room I very obviously teleported into, and even walk past the guy that was JUST trying to arrest me 20 seconds ago and saw me teleport away. I didn't hide my name or face, it was just as if I was invisible that round. Nobody bats an eye, I just go back to the assembly room and teleport to base. Everything ends up going smoothly and our lord is summoned without hitch. I'd like to blame everything that happened on the chaos happening around the bridge, but I should have been nabbed by security at least 3 times that round.

I cant remember this round that clearly. But I will try my best. I was a Warden, I heard over comms that the Captain said to the Brig Phys if they wanted a Body Scanner, Brig Phys said no. Later, after dying due to a Teleporter Gun Traitor, with a Holoparasite then being cloned. We caught the TGT, and they were dead, and we knew they had a Holoparasite. Brig Phys proceded to drag the TGT to their Brig Bay, revived them to full health. Meanwhile we were screaming at the Brig Phys they had a Holoparasite. Brig Phys procedded to revive them, thus making the Holoparasite out, killing me. I got cloned. We caught another Traitor, they were damaged. And due to the Brig Phys not accepting the Body Scanner, he died due to internal bleeding. We got the Traitor out, but they needed to be cloned. Brig Phys, proceeded to take the Traitor, try to revive them. And the Heart Tissue is damaged (You need to clone me dude), they try to revive them by repairing the heart, I was screaming at them. Then they proceeded to commit suicide. Because I hated the Brig Phys, and they were stupid. The Captain decided to demote me for "Disregard of Human Life." Angered by this, I proceed to leg-sweep and cuff the Captain, the Detective was there and shot me. I was in Processing for 30 minutes, kept trying to escape. Then a Slaughter Demon showed up and killed me.

Whatever that Warden did to Syndicate. He pissed them so much to send four agents after him. And Yup... He had been deal with in old fashion gang-banged mafia style.

That's a helluva lot better thing for them to do than stick with tehir job and be completely useless. At least they're actively declaring "I don't want to do anything and am opting out of the other jobs" than "I'm going to take up a job slot and do nothing with it"

Opening a locker and finding a Tajaran

One round, as a Magistrate, security comes by and brings in a Vulpkanin (committed trespass or something like that). Being bored and making sure that the brigging process went smoothly, I went to go see the brigging, at that very moment, I see the prisoner is a gaudy, neon colored Vulpkanin (It was even mentioned that you could see them in the dark!) During their time in the cell, they were proving to be annoying. Times runs out and they are let out. Ten minutes later, they were brought in, again. They get brigged, and during that time, they decide to howl as much as possible. It was a cult round or a traitor one. Either way, I was mostly by myself in the brig (no warden, physician went to do something, HoS and Officers were patrolling/seeing to antag activity). By the time their timer was up, I was very irritated at this prisoner's stupidity and the endless howling (even told them to shut up multiple times). The moment their timer announces their time is up, they suddenly drop dead (coincidentally, the armory blew up that very moment, but I think that was unrelated). An examination showed high burn damage (along with a lack of the ability of being cloned). To this day, I am not sure if their death was admin related or something, but I cheered up when I saw them die randomly.

Cute drawing time. Here's Zeke, Jonah and Churchy spending time with Sax.