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I aint no fortunate son~

Station "Cyberiad" data log entry 01 09/22/2562 Unit 072537720173(f) - C.L.A.I.R.E Today marked the first day of my model being sent out for real use in the system, no more controlled tests or constant tweaking of my personality to make me ideal for my model's purpose. Finally given the freedom I've been looking forwards to for so long now, even if much of that time is difficult to recall on account of all the resets and hardware adjustments. Today I became my own entity to find my way in the system, having been sent to a "NSS Cyberiad" to start myself off which seems quite fortunate thus far. The station itself is large, far larger than any of the test environments I was put through before and there were so many people I couldn't keep track of them all! So many people going about their business, all with a different job to do with different loads put upon them by their peers. My function to limit hardware stress was a standard civilian, for the previously stated reason and to grant myself the time I required to learn the station layout. I mapped out most of the station quite quickly, saving a digital blueprint to my backup storage should anything happen to primary and then found myself standing outside of the "Head of Personnel" office simply watching everyone going by, occasionally poking my head in to speak to the Head of Personnel who for my first day was a woman by the name of Amy. She was a magnificent person, everything about her filled me with curiosity and wonder. Her hair, the way she spoke and acted, her kindness, the company she kept. That final point especially. I was allowed to meet Amy's partner or as she said potential partner, a decently sized Tajaran male who had a name I never could recall but proved to be an acceptable individual. Their relations too filled me with curiosity, as they demonstrated I have never felt before or even been a witness to. All the labs and testing environments I was in were very standard, considering everything and none of them showed me the affection that they showed each other. I know kindness, anger, sadness and even hatred but what they demonstrated is far beyond anything I've come to be familiar with yet and deep down I believe that I too would one day like to feel these things towards a living being as Amy makes it look like a truly wonderful experience. Perhaps an even better one than saving a life or managing to satisfy myself in finishing previously unresolved data points. Time will tell though, I suppose. For now I'm to take things slowly and carefully as I've already burned through one chassis, even if I was lucky enough to manage a full data backup before I was destroyed some of it has appeared to be corrupted. I cannot recall what it was that destroyed my chassis or the few minutes leading up to the event but I know it must have been bad to not just have my old one repaired. -Data log concludes-

>Be Beauregard the grey greytider, also a syndicate agent. >Have to obtain the red documents held by Desmond Summy and prevent Grin Fandango the clown for leaving the station alive. >Sounds almost trivial, I think i will make it a bit more interesing >I decide upon a plan to sleepy pen the clown full of sequential doses of 13 Loko, Porktonium and absinthe. >I am in the shower filling my smugglers satchel with ingredients for the plan and is just about to cover it with a tile when Kennard Rose opens the door and sees the satchel. >I take off, get paranoid and decide to get agent ID card under the name Magnum Brzezinski, the civilian >Shit is going down, the Clown is breaking into the armory and Desmond is impersonating a NT naval officer. >I decide to sleepypen some officers to get rid of the ketamine and add to the chaos. >One of the officers wakes up and runs into me outside of the bar, she wants to search me. >I get captured and sent to perma 45 minutes into the shift, losing my traitor items and my set of blue documents instead receiving a fresh tracking implant in order to keep tabs on me. >After a little while alone in perma i figure that i am pretty much out of the round and feel pretty salty about getting captured for such a stupid reason, then two people are imprisoned with me,one of them is fellow syndicate agent Desmond Summy, i talk to them for a while and then HoS shows up with the clown. >The HoS removes Grin Fandango's handcuffs and gives him a telebaton hit for good measure. >The clown is pissed, he disarms the HoS, telebatons and start cuffing him, what a hero! >The HoS calls for help, security storms perma and takes the clown away and threatens him with execution. >I strip my prison clothes and instead clothe myself in a grey jumpsuit, gloves and a leather jacket using the biogenerator. >Clown is given a second chance and is returned to perma, we immediately start plotting our escape. We are going to breach the basketball court, space our selves with suit sensors on and get recovered by the paramedic and cloned. >Desmond has resigned himself to imprisonment but wishes us good luck, he tells me he hid the red documents in a labcoat in scichem. >We start breaking the windows, AI snitches on us, but clown keeps smashing and is quickly taken away not to be seen again. >The CE is comes into the basketball court and is trying to repair the windows, i disarm him and threaten to beat him with a stool until he backs away and i finally manages to smash the outer window with the stool. >I spacewalk to solar, i am loaded with warm donk pockets so it takes me quite a while to die. >Paramedic is busy giving joyrides to a vox, so instead after many agonizing minutes the pod pilot picks me up and dumps my dead body outside of processing. >An officer that seems oblivious to the fact that i am a known EoC drags my body to the cloner. >I pop out, but i am too afraid to go into the hallway and i lack equipment and ID so i enter the morgue and tell the coroner a story about how my friend Slith Skaar has gone missing and asks him to check the trays. >While the coroner is popping the trays i quickly steal a fully loaded tool belt from an unathi suicide victim. >When Slith is not found the coroner tells me i should try PDAing my friend and this is when i remember that you can use a PDA as your ID if you just need a new name. >I asked for a dead guys PDA and receive it, i am now Eave the civilian. >I hack into scichem and find the labcoat with the documents exactly where Desmond said it would be. >The shuttle is called and i hide in the back during the ride to CC. >Greentext >I realize that the escape attempt i instigated probably got the clown executed >Every turned out better than expected

I was having a great round, my department was full of very competent people, although there was one incident, when all of telecoms was offline, so we were using the Station Bounced Radio. One of our engineers were having a great time with the barista, and I made a joke to our CE about her acting like a school girl, but right at that time, he decided to turn his Radio on... and it got sent to every engineer. But other than that everything was amazing, we were meant to build the BSA, and we did, in record time, I had a small heart to heart moment with our Russian CE, and was able to apologize to the girl. Although the research department only had 1 guy, we managed, somehow. The shooting was basically a party, everyone on the station was talking about it, saying wait up, the captain was making an inspirational speech, and the AI was super nice, since one of it's laws were 'being kind to crewmembers increase productivity' (but someone wanted to change the law for some reason). We set up multiple comfy chairs and sofas for everyone who could make it, someone was even using a pod to watch it all. And after that was all done, we fired the gun... at first it was amazing, until the air got sucked out. I didn't have a problem, as I was in a space suit and buckled myself to the chair, but our Captain and the Blueshield officer didn't buckle in. They body slammed me so hard I died, but it was still an overall great, I was revived by cloning, and when I came to, everyone was saying "we love you AI" or "you are the best AI", and the AI kept responding with "I lo- hate you all! I hope you burn in hell", I joined in, and some doc decided this was his time to start practicing his marriage recitals, and said "Do you, Johnny, take the AI as your loving wife," and I was so confused, I said "wow... that escalated quickly," after that, he said "And do you, AI, take Johnny as your loving husband," so yeah... I got married to a tsundere AI. Not much happened but it really has a special place in my heart.

Here's a new one. Hot off the presses. I'll name this one "Riot or Wrong?" I'm an officer, early on we catch a traitor with a pen sword and emag who attempted to kill someone. We put em in perma. Captain orders we borg them. There is some opposition amongst command that delays the borgification but it finally is complete. The opposition was made public somewhere along the way and riots began in front of the bridge. It was really confusing for a while but at some point security needed to don riot gear to break up the crowd. We told them to disperse, some refused, we began arresting, uncuffed rioters began dragging cuffed ones away, a civilian who, as far as I knew wasn't a rioter, started dragging a cuffed rioter off. I tase and cuff them, another officer gets the rioter, I start bringing the civ to the brig. Here's where it got...interesting. in LOOC they say "Why am I being arrested? I've committed no crime, answer or I'll AHELP" I stop and IC I say "you are being arrested for helping a criminal, you tried to drag away a cuffed rioter that we were arresting" I can't remember what was IC or LOOC at this point but from this point forward there was a mixture of the two with them telling me that's not a law, I'm not allowed to search them. Despite them being SO cooperative I say I'm going to search them and if they have nothing on them they get off with a warning. I find a stunprod on them. Tell them I need to brig them for weapons possession. They keep arguing IC and OOC that I can't do this, so I say in LOOC "Alright I'll amuse you, I'll AHELP this" I end up MHELPing explaining that I've arrested a civilian that was helping a rioter get away, am I allowed to arrest and search them? Mentors get back saying "yes, aiding and abetting." So I've now confirmed with mentors I'm in the right, inform the civ in LOOC, they continue arguing. I confiscate the weapons, bring them to a cell, and say all I'm gonna brig them for is weapons charge, 10 min. I COULD have given them another 10 for helping the rioter and lack of cooperation but I felt bad cuz they were already in a bad mood. Before leaving I say in LOOC "while you are in your cell, go read space law, look up weapons posession under medium crimes, then scroll below capital crimes and find aiding and abetting" They respond in LOOC "Fuck you, I've read it enough...I'm right..also 'while you are in your cell?' ICKY OOCKY!" I respond "ICKY OOCKY? Like asking me why you are under arrest in LOOC? or arguing the arrest in LOOC?" He's says "FUCK YOU" admin turns off LOOC Sort of felt like I needed to report their behavior but again, they were already having a bad enough time, so I didn't bother. Already felt bad enough about all the stuff I put the guy through already but, I've got a job to do. Pretty sure the admins were already dealing with the situation. I never got bwoinked so I'm all good. Just another day in shitcurity. AS FOR THE RIOTS. The round ended with the AI being pitted against the captain, AI obviously siding with rioters. Security was divided, some trying to arrest the captain, some trying to help captain. I believe the HOS remained neutral through the whole thing, and kept a fairly cool head despite the situation. Good HOS. Karma for him. I didn't know what the hell to do so aside from a few confused tase and handcuffs, I was just trying to prevent violence. I believe the captain ended up getting spaced. Shuttle was emagged. GAME OVER YEAAAAAAA!!! If anyone wonders why someone would primarily work security, notably I've read someone saying "Anyone who works security primarily is a masochist"...once you get adjusted to the stress it initially causes, and are adept at dealing with all the various situations that are thrown at you, it leads to a hell of alot of interesting stories. Seclife. EDIT: I explained this story to my spouse, and we've now decided any time we get in an argument where one of us is clearly wrong, when the party who is wrong realizes they are wrong they are to end the argument by saying "FUCK YOU! I KNOW SPACE LAW!"