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I play a lot of security. A lot. You may have seen me around as Cherry Waves, often playing as the Head of Security. It's a thankless, stressful job that, I for some reason, love above all else on the station. If you've played security, or ask security, you'll often hear stories about what they hate, or fear, the most about working security, and sure enough, I also have something that I hate/fear the most. If you've seen me around, you'll probably have heard me moan about certain antag roles that I loathe going up against as security. Let's take vampires, for example. You hear the stuttering call for help over the radio, followed by silence. Twenty minutes later, and there's a powered vampire running around, and he has the tasers from two of your officers. This is followed by a chase through maintenance, sometimes spanning an entire shift. Security dreads vampires, not out of fear of death, no. Death is sweet release. They fear the vamp because of the predictability. Yet this is still not the Horror of Security. Another one is cultist. Loud cultists are interesting and fun to deal with. Stealthy off-station cult? Not so much. As security, you have no reliable way of dealing with them, other than trying to pick them off on station when they pop out. Like whack-a-cultist. Sure, you can send the pod pilot out on a search, followed by an expedition force, who then get slaughtered due to the poor planning of your boss (me). Not to mention the absolute mess processing turns in to. Three cultists in at the same time, and one officer is left behind to deal with them? Not great, especially when they're all miners who, if deconverted, rush back to Lavaland to "do their jobs," only to get reconverted. And that's if you even know they exist. You might just patrol the halls, thinking you're keeping the peace during an extended round, until suddenly Nar'Nar pops out from beyond the veil of time and ruins your lunch date. Yet again, this is still not the Horror of Security. "Enough foreplay, Fontaine, get to the point." The TRUE Horror of Security is -drumroll- The Warden. The Warden is an unpredictable beast. Vampires are predictable, and to a certain extent, so are cultists. But the insane machinations of the bald-headed Warden are beyond mortal comprehension. Every shift I start as a the Head of Security, I don't worry about cultists, vampires, nukies. Any of those have the power to put me out of my misery. No, I hope for a Warden that, isn't necessarily incredible, just not a mouth-breathing troglodyte who hasn't even bothered reading a single line of Space Law. To avoid coming off as an elitist, let me give you an example. To clarify, most of us know how to identify the wild Warden that doesn't play by the rules. It's easy. Are they on the secway, zooming around on the station on green, swinging their baton and brandishing their taser? He's the Warden of your nightmares, and he makes his own laws. This is a story thread, so naturally here's a story. This one is recent. It's Vampires. We heard the call for help in science/med maintenance, as is the standard. We rush there, Vampire is no where to be seen, but thankfully the victim is alive, although a panicky mess. Time goes by, and the vampire increases in power. Not much time, mind you. Like fifteen minutes. Now the Vampire is spotted in it's natural habitat of sci/med maints again, and the Warden judges that no other man on the station is up to the job. He rushes out, ignoring his trusty Secway, as it'd only get in his way. He reaches his target, and is ready to dispense justice. Except, of course, he doesn't. He dies. Alone and unafraid in medical maintenance. His body is easily recovered, and even his ID, to the great surprise of everyone. So we just revive him and move on, right? Nope. I keep his ID on me for safekeeping, and to swiftly demote him when he makes his return. Except he doesn't. I ask the officers if they ever encountered him after his tour of medbay, but no luck. He's not even on the cryosleeper logs. We brush it off, there's other things to deal with. Then an entire HOUR later I get a call from the HoP. The Warden is asking for his job back. I go there, and sure as hell, he's standing there. With half an hour left of the shift, I ask him where he were for the last hour. He claims he was asleep. No one I asked knew where, and he was too busy asking for his job back to clarify further. I inform him about the added workload with no Warden, how I felt about it, and declined his re-employment. I have quite a few horror stories from playing Security, and largely they don't feature antags. They're the character who gets a laugh-track when they enter the door. Most of them even star me as king moron. If you read this far, let me know if you want to hear more, or share your own Horror of Security.

Even if I'm having a good morning, I'm resetting your count. May you all have lovely mornings, afternoons, and evenings spacemen.

Forgot to add, this is based from Risk of Rain 2's intro cutscene that just hits me the right way.

I've just joined the forum and so I'm saying Hi! I've been playing on the server for a month or two now so it was only right to give an introduction. I've been playing SS13 for quite awhile now but have never touched any of the forums so I'm changing this now. I hope to see you all on our wondrous station.