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I can be your angle or your debil Ignore the parole's errors in formatting/spelling, the clown was banging on my window trying to get me to let him into the armory

Screenshot dump from the last 2 months : )

Tihichat, a Vox working for Nanotrasen, has faced a lifetime of discrimination from other crewmates due to their unique biology. But in one shift, Tihichat decided to take a stand against this pervasive space racism. As an Head of Personal Tihichat reported the harassment to Central Command and requested they take action to stop it. Instead, Central Command sent them a bucket of KFV from their subsidiary company, KFV Incorporated, which caused Tihichat to resign in protest. But Tihichat was not done fighting for justice. In a later shift as an Ntr, Tihichat decided to take a different approach and attempted to change Central Command from within. They submitted a report calling for legal changes to recognize Vox rights and asked for the support of all command. However, Central Command responded with an angry fax, telling Tihichat to "cease this nonsense." To add insult to injury, Central Command broke into Tihichat's office and replaced their locker contents with 20 full KFV buckets. Tihichat's story is a powerful reminder of the challenges Vox face in a universe dominated by humans. It also shows the importance of standing up for what you believe in, even when faced with overwhelming opposition. We should all strive to be like Tihichat and fight for a better, more inclusive space station.

I once saw a vox dip their donk pocket in chocolate milk. What sort of a deranged psychopath does that? Vox are pox.

Vox steal over four billion pieces of candy from babies every year. Snap your local Vox's neck, save an innocent life from being a victim of the shoal. Vox are pox

One shift I was a Cling ai (yes, a cling ai. Even the Admin was confused) So, started off normal. Just planning to unleash the power of the sun on the station, as ye do, hacking APC's to get more runtime, blah blah blah. At some point the Cap wants me to change my law set so Ian, the bestest boi on the station, would be protected. Of course as it was my first time playing Antag AI, I made a new rule, thinking that it was normal Boy was I wrong Now I had all of command on my Holographic arse, and not only was I panicking trying to get the Borg assisting me to screw with the air, THE FECKING CLOWN HAD PENATRATING ROUNDS Not the way I wanted it to go, but hey I shoulda prepared better. BUT TO ADD INSULT TO INJURY: Command managed to get my card after I was disabled (fecking clown...) and they did what you'd expect. Ran me through RnD, blah blah blah boring stuff. Next thing you know, the person carrying my card hopped over the kitchen bench, and deep fried the card. And Ate me. I was dead, so at least I wasnt being fried alive (or, powered idk). BUT STILL. Not expected at all, but I had a good laugh. So yeah that's the story how I was deepfried and eaten as a Ai

Hostage situations are a rare sight on Paradise, and I imagine most other servers as well. I had only attempted it once before, and as you can imagine, to no great success. This time was different, though. While it was ill planned and rushed, the setup was almost perfect - put the hostage inside the plasma filled turbine chamber, a button press away from turning the slime girl hostage into a Creme Brulè. The plan was to get the CMO there alone, with the hypospray to trade for her wife’s life, but security soon sniffed things out, and I was forced to make it publicly known - any interference would mean the woman’s life would end. Soon after, security was at the door, the Captain too, ready to make the trade. The Captain was to enter alone, but as you can imagine, the indifference to the general safety of the crew that every security officer harbours in their blackened hearts proved too strong - the urge to baton and disable too intoxicating. One officer tried to contain his bloodthirsty colleague, but he could not keep them all back. Forced to activate my adrenal implant, I rush for the button, the room filling with a blaze - only for the hostage to be rescued by an engineering cyborg in the last second. Defeated, I make my escape. I change my disguise and blend in with the crew once more, unsure of what to do next. Passing by the bridge, I spot the heroic cyborg receiving a medal for its actions. As it proudly drags the medal behind it as it leaves, triumph running through its circuits, I hit it with my flash and open its cover, overloading it’s system with my emag. My objectives forfeit, I give it one single task to wrong the right. Kill the hostage it rescued. It has no choice but to comply. It begins its search as I make a desperate attempt to fulfil my duties - leading to my death. From the afterlife, through the salty tears, I spot the cyborg deep in space, broken beyond repair, the body of the woman it saved floating lifelessly beside it. And a carp. There was also a carp. I learned that the officer responsible for the mishandling of the situation had been demoted on the spot, but being the beast of pride that he was, he ended his own life right then and there. There are many things to fear on the Cyberiad. But there is nothing more dreadful than he who believes he can do no wrong - he who’s crusade for justice leaves a trail of mangled bodies in his wake, all in the name of turning a line of text from a green color, to a red color.

WARNING: This entire story is just complete nerd shit so prepare for technohell Expect more chapters as time goes on, but this is basically the chronicles of why you never want to become host Chapter listing Obtaining the damn server The pain of an OS install when your ISO is 6 gigabytes and moves at 3 megabytes a second The story of how windows (and/or asrock) sucks Moving everything to a new platform The first performance test, AKA byond sucks on linux Getting the game running on windows How to migrate with minimal downtime Why emulation sucks and paravirtualisation is the future (EXTRA EXTRA: BYOND sucks) The woes of getting logs into a nice viewer without killing the CPU BONUS CHAPTER - Remotely managing a server where you dont have a KVM/IPMI console

USE A TITLE LIKE THIS: "Banned by ADMINNAME: Ban appeal for [YOUR BYOND USERNAME HERE]" EXAMPLE: "Banned by Regens: Ban appeal for [insert ckey here]" IC NAME: The character name you used when you got banned CKEY: This is your username on BYOND DATE OF BAN: Date you were banned, shown in the ban message you get when entering the server ROUND ID: Also shown in the ban message. May not always be present. Looks like a number, e.g: 12345 DURATION OF BAN: Also shown in the ban message. E.g: "until appealed". ADMIN BYOND KEY: The admin who banned you. Please type '@' in front of their name, so it looks like this: @Kyet. If you don't know which admin banned you, ask one of us privately to look it up for you. REASON FOR BAN: The reason as to why you were banned. Shown when you connect to the server. DO NOT edit this, quote the exact ban reason shown when you connect. YOUR APPEAL: Explain why you think we should unban you. The best approach is generally to read the rules, then explain which rule you broke in your appeal, explaining why you won't do it again if unbanned. If you're truly convinced you never broke the rules in the first place, you could alternatively explain why - but that approach has a much lower chance of success. Try hard to identify which rule you broke. ------------------------------------------------------------------------ EXAMPLE: IC NAME: Grayman Tide BYOND KEY: Greytide16236 DATE OF BAN: 7/9/13 DURATION OF BAN: This is a permanent ban ADMIN BYOND KEY: Regens REASON FOR BAN: Insulting people YOUR APPEAL: I broke rule 1, and openly insulted another player in OOC. I am sorry I lost my temper and did this, and will not do it again.