TullyBBurnalot

I literally cannot believe I missed the shrink. I'll whip something up.

Added: To Surgery SOP. Sorry, Von Bon.

Someone set off a vomit grenade at Escape. Again. Carl sighed, dropping the mop into the bucket and opting to eat a couple of Twinkies before getting to work once again. It had been three minutes and twenty-two seconds since he spaced the Chief Medical Officer. No one noticed. There was something to be said about mopping. Engineering was busy containing a gigantic ball of electricity, Science was busy blowing stuff up and making war machines and Genetics was busy committing sins against Nature. But him? He was mopping. A simple job. Water the mop, rinse the floor, repeat until everything shines. Simple, yet effective. Without him, the station would probably be covered in gunk in ten minutes. Still, the amount of vomit grenades detonated by random Scientists had grown uncomfortably big during the past shifts. He made a point of sending a PDA message to the Research Director and Internal Affairs whenever this happened, but nothing usually came of it. No one wanted to bother firing someone over a vomit grenade. After all, he was just a janitor. Even the walls were covered. Urgh. Civilians came and went, a couple of them trying to run off with his cart before realizing it was chained to the person mopping. Carl didn't even bother looking up anymore. Most of these people were sadly lacking in the cerebral department, and probably wouldn't be able to figure out how to unhook the chain even if their brains came up that idea in the first place. So he kept mopping. It was calm and soothing. "Help, Tom Neril's killing someone with an axe!" Carl sighed. --- --- --- --- --- --- --- --- --- It was a right mess. He had sat down on a bench, waiting for Security to put the now beheaded corpse into a body bag and drag it off to the Morgue before cutting down the police tape and going to work on the crime scene. The PDA message he had received earlier from the suppposed killer didn't even cross his mind. At that moment, he was far too busy cleaning and being generally mad at life for having created the mess in the first place. As he bent down to pick up a small shard of bone, however, he noticed a small glint from under a nearby table. It was nearly imperceptible, and Carl knew it had been sheer luck that he had seen it. Cautiously, he approached it, finding a small, black tube of metal with what appeared to be some sort of mirror on one end. There was a button on it. *fshhhhh* Oh, this would do nicely. --- --- --- --- --- --- His new weapon would most likely never be found again. No one ever suspected the Janitor. Carl made a point of swinging by the Brig to make sure that Neril fellow had been caught. Sure enough, there he was, cuffed to a chair and screaming his lungs out about police brutality. A tall, muscular Unathi in a black trenchcoat was conversing with a small, blonde woman dressed all in light blue. Carl couldn't make out what they were saying, but after a couple of minutes, the woman took Neril and vanished into the Prison Wing. The screaming stopped soon afterwards. Back to the job. The Captain was still by the Bridge when he swung by, sitting at the main Communications Console. If the assassination was to be done properly, the Captain would have to be lured to his bedroom, somehow. But how? ... An idea dawned in his mind. He went back into the Custodial Closet and opened his Uplink. He clicked a button and watched as a small encryption key, no bigger than the nail on his thumb, materialized in front of him. Closing the Uplink, Carl slotted the key into his own headset. "HoS, was the traitor executed?" "Yesss, sssir, the Warden hasss jusst done it" "Fantastic. Make sure they get put to work as a Cyborg, alright? "Of coursssse, sssir" Time to get to work.

Completely refurbished the Guide to Security. (and it only took me an hour!)

Updated the Atmospheric Technician page with relevant information, added some more information regarding fires.

Updated the Blueshield page with relevant information. (even the Access level was wrong)

Got the Blueshield page, you may cross it out. EDIT: And the Atmos Tech page too. EDIT 2: And the Guide to Security page as well.

Actually, we had a similar situation to this a few days back. According to Regen, and this was backed up by events in the actual round, you using internals doesn't matter if the virus is airborne. The other person's internals matter, only. I know it's counter-intuitive, but hey, there we go. That said, I'll be adding "without Chef Medical Officer" approval to the end of that Guideline. Ah, this is where the beauty of interlocking SOP comes around. Take a look: Can't have a list of symptoms without analyzing the thing, now can ye? What Shadey said. I'll add something about working together with the Chemist to ensure this. This is problematic. This was actually a matter of discussion between me and Fox, and frankly, I can see the point he was trying to make. Directly limiting the method that can be used to cure a virus is, in many respects, dictating how people should roleplay to a degree that Paradise has never actually done. While it makes sense, in a HRP setting, to basically say "No one but the Virologist can cure viruses, ever", even in a MedRP setting that kinda falls flat. A lot of this is because the virus and Virology system we have now is utter shit, and in an Outbreak situation, it's far easier to just get the Chemist/CMO to administer Radium to someone, get their Antibodies and boom, virus cured. As tzo mentioned back in Science SOP, this needs to be a melding of mostly IC with some OOC. As much as I'd love for Virology to get some love, forcing others to sit by and do nothing while Virology goes around and fixes the virus alone is... something I'd rather not have. That said, I'll fix up Viral Outbreak Procedures to account for this, by adding: And: To Viral Outbreak Procedures, as well as a small working definition of what a Viral Outbreak is. Moving on: The important bit there is the 25%. Plus, at least its written down now. These are all actually nice catches. I'll add: To Virologist SOP. Hmm... ... I'll add: To Virology SOP as well.

Maybe make them be like a mini-oxygen tank? Stick them in a canister and fill them up when required. I can now foresee clowns dragging Oxygen canisters through the station, armed with a dozen airhorns...

Well, that isn't... strictly necessary, and no one ever checks Med Records as, unlike Sec Records, they end up being irrelevant 99,99999999% of the time when it comes to regular Medbay duties. No real point in having that in Medbay SOP, really. EDIT: Goddamnit, Coldflame, stop ninja'ing my replies.

I believe the "bloat" argument actually comes into play here, especially since those roles basically do the same thing. However, will add: To MD SOP.

Added:

While I'm a bit reticent to differentiate it, seeing as they basically have the same access, I also have Coroner and Surgeon procedures, so I can always add something like this to MD SOP:

426. I may not utilize an Asset Protection RIG Suit to "Rambo it up"; 427. Even though company policy allows it, may no longer bring fish sticks to company dinners; 428. If meteors are pelting the station, I should assume my superiors should be informed before the Engine is released; 428a. Even if I specifically told the Engineering Department not to set up any Engines; 429. Lady Tesla cannot be courted; 430. The Supermatter Crystal is not a "Nucleation Babymaker", and I should stop referring to it as such; 431. I may not abduct a Wryn and force it through ERT Basic Training so it may "strengthen the hive"; 432. May no longer contact SolGov in matters concerning anything; 433. There is no Vulpkanin equivalent of Kingston's Disease, and I should stop trying to make a data entry for "Wuffle's Illness" in the Trurl's Medical Databanks; 434. May not cover Lambda 7's armour in woad and rename them "Screaming Scots"; 434a. May not rename them "Harrier Highlanders" either; 434b. Or any other alliterative appellation; 435. The fact that this list is in the four hundreds should not consistently be an ice-breaker topic; 436. The NXS Klapaucius is not to be used as a beer cooler; 437. May no longer hand out Exosuit Thrusters to anyone; 438. May no longer strip down Gygax Exosuits of weapons and re-brand them as "High-Speed Breach Assistance Vehicles"; 439. Ripley APLUs should not be used to fight Xenomorph infestations; 439a. Regardless of how effective they are at doing so; 440. Decloners should not be used for "Impromptu Baby Picture Day", and I should be horribly ashamed of the sins against Nature that I have created; 440a. May not attempt to re-brand said creations as a rock band named Sins Against Nature; 441. Vampires do not make good assistants for Blood Drives; 442. May no longer offer to sell the Syndicate the coordinates to the Captain's Office if the Captain is being exceptionally incompetent; 443. Steve is not allowed anywhere anymore; 444. Fucking Steve; 445. Seminars should not have a casualty report, and I am to report to the Ethics Committee how I managed to somehow make it happen; 446. B.L.A.C.K is my assigned Bodyguard Droid, not a "hamster ball with pulse cannons"; 447. May not paint a Gygax shock pink and call it "Hotstuff"; 448. Brain Burgers are not an adequate means of execution for Changelings; 449. Shadowlings do not make good nightlights; 450. The words "Nuclear Operatives" and "Bathroom Break" should never be in the same sentence

You know, I'll bite. Lemme sum it up, then: CMO: Carry around a defib if you want, pack a syringe gun to handle Genetics shits, make sure Chem doesn't blow up, don't release viruses if you don't know what they do, clone people. MD: Wear fucking gloves, keep Medbay clean, make sure there's at least one defib to be used, don't let corpses out to rot, make sure there's Biomass, make sure people are cloned properly, make sure you're actually treating people, stabilize people before dumping them in surgery Chemist: Make meds. Not bombs, not drugs, not useless shit, meds. Don't leave Chemistry to do random crap if there are no meds. Make meds in a reasonable amount of time. Virologist: Don't get yourself infected. Don't leave Virology infected and make sure infected shit gets thrown into space. Don't release viruses without asking anyone. Have radium. Cure viruses properly. Don't let the whole station die by virus. Paramedic: No Ghetto Surgery unless literally everything went to shit. Do surgery if no one else can. Carry a defib. Make sure people don't die on the way to treatment. Make sure dead people get cloned by yelling at the doctors (I'll even remove Guideline 6). Actually carry some medication for use. Surgery: Wear your fucking gear, don't perform live surgery unless the person doesn't want anesthetics, clean your hands, damnit, and keep everything in the OR. Viral Outbreak: Cure the fucking virus, don't let it spread. Coroner: Do your job. This is literally what Medbay is supposed to be doing. Medbay's job is to fix people, keep them in the round and, if required, bring them back. If you are not prepared to do that, then be prepared to get fired.

It's actually a nifty little thing I have here for Captain SOP. That he/she can deliberately disregard it if necessary, but if anything goes wrong, it's on them.

As mentioned, SOP is malleable. As I have not yet mentioned, SOP is not that malleable. SOP can/should be molded/circumvented if there's a legitimate reason to do so. Not just so the person can be "cool" or "fearsome". We're not running a military nation-state here.

Yes, but the whole point is that, if necessary, the tools can be removed and the whole thing refitted. It's still a combat-ready chassis. Same goes for the Gygax. Yes, it can mount utility tools. Yes, it's faster. But it can also very easily mount laser cannons, shotguns and machine guns. Also what Shadey said.

To reiterate what was said before, the Gygax is a combat chassis. In line with the "firefighter tank", I'd think a better analogy would be to take, say, an APC, remove the weapons but keep the emplacements, install some minor tools on it, and call it a "support vehicle". The mere existence of a Gygax is a security risk, as it takes literally seconds for those harmless tools to be replaced with dangerous weapons. That said, thrusters on a Mech would be fucking amazing, and would give Engineering ample reason to use a Mech with a Mounted RCD.

To be perfectly honest, a lot of it falls onto basically this. Virology is incredibly dull, incredibly tedious and, worst of all, fully RNG-based. Much like Genetics, you can hit the motherload in 15 minutes, or spend 2 hours to get nothing useful, or anything in between. Personally, I feel SOP should reflect what Virology is, at least technically, supposed to be doing, which is finding beneficial viruses and finding cures for existing, non-beneficial viruses. That said, and to get back on track, in terms of pure mechanics, I can see where you're coming from. As such: Changing to: And: Is being stricken, with the previous sentence changed to:

It's not about the implant. It's about the job.

Right, first off, the Science Job SOP thing was open for well over half a month. It was also very much discussed in-game in OOC chat. Secondly, pretty much what Keroman said. Just because you get to make the toys, doesn't mean you can play with them unless you have a very, very, very good fucking reason. If you're playing Science just so you can play with the toys, and I fucking hate having to say this, but you're playing it wrong. Science is supposed to make stuff that makes everyone else's life a hell of a lot easier, not hoard stuff for themselves. You are not an insular nation-state. If you want to use a Mech, play a Department that has a reason to use it, then use it. Not to mention, no one in their right mind would fire a Scientist for throwing a Synthflesh/Styptic/Sulfadiazine grenade. Plus, as said, SOP is malleable. And here's a radical notion: ask people. Literally all your problems can be solved by asking. Nowhere even in this SOP is written and stamped consent required for anything. Literally all you have to do is go on the radio and ask. If you get a no, then don't complain about people raining on your parade when you ignore them.

I ain't even gonna touch the Balance Argument, because I don't need to. I'ma touch the Effort Argument. Here are the current ways of having infinite Chems: 1) Have an Odysseus scan the reagent. This requires that either Science or Cargo provide Robotics with the ability to print the boards, or the boards themselves. It also requires Robotics to actually get off their ass and do it. And even then, it's limited to 75 units of the reagent at a time, you need to shoot syringe out and manually inject their contents into something, and even then it's limited by battery power; 2) Certain chems in the sleepers. This requires that Science upgrade the sleepers properly, plus it needs someone to constantly be putting a Test Animal through dialysis, then processing the blood beaker, making the pills, etc. Having a button that boils down to "Poosh, git Chem" is a ridiculous notion. Infini-chems take effort, as is. Removing that effort is just plain dumb.

While I disagree in principle, purely because I know some people still think Defibs are magical things that can fix literally anything, I'll swap it over to: Because Defibs are still valuable. Workplaces accidents happen. Workplaces accidents involving Virology tend to end in pain, misery, tears and death. Part of Virology's job is to also handle any Viral Outbreaks that may happen. The point of this Guideline isn't to make a vial of Antibodies for every single little mutation, it's to keep a vial of Antibodies whenever new antibodies are present. It doesn't really matter if they're just mutating new samples, having an extra 1 or 2 Antibodies is always useful, since you just upped your odds of having the right antibodies for a random virus considerably. That said, I can see how this can be misconstrued, so I'll change it to: You know, this actually gives me an idea. Changing to: Because some standards are required. Kinda like the whole "Engine failed = fire the CE if we survive" thing. As per the above point, changing to: Better not to run off when no Defibs are around. I'm just going to have to recite what others have said below. They're not mandatory, but every OR gets a box for a reason.

Uh, guys, it's already in here. So yeah.