TullyBBurnalot

SCIENCE JOB SOP: Complete Greetings, aspiring SOP writers. If you've clicked this thread, then you're either interested in contributing to Standard Operating Procedure, or are merely interested in seeing how it's going. Therefore, I shall begin by explaining what this (soon-to-be) megathread is all about: Part 1: What is this? Approximately 4 months ago, Necaladun approached me with a personal project of his: a complete overhaul of Standard Operating Procedure, meant to centralize SOP in such a way that allowed for more interaction with the Legal sub-Department, more actual guidelines on how to conduct one's performance, and generally formalize what was once only nebulous guidelines in an effort to get everyone on the same page. This was the project that led to the current version of Security SOP. However, it was left half done, as Necaladun took his leave shortly after Sec SOP was added, and the project crumbled from lack of interest/time. However, I continued the project, but only recently picked it back up in full. The point of this megathread will be to, at the end of the line, have a single, well-defined, centralized Standard Operating Procedure that everyone can look at and fully comprehend, without any self-contradictory information. This, of course, will be changed in the Wiki, which is still the main source of information for the playerbase. Part 2: How does it work? Seeing as I actually have most of this stuff already written down, the process will be quite simple, and I'll break it down in stages: Stage 1: Selection of which part of SOP to look at, out of provided options (because we have to start somewhere). This will be done via poll; Stage 2: Proposal of new SOP. This will come from myself, again, because I have pretty much most of it already written down, so we have a solid base to go from; Stage 3: General feedback from the community. This is the main part of the process, as it will be the one where everyone can pitch in, say which parts are right, which parts are wrong, what should be changed, etc; Stage 4: Amendments made to SOP based on this feedback, and continued discussion, until a finalized version is produced; Stage 5: SOP is posted on the Wiki; Stage 6: Refer to Stage 1 Do keep in mind the following: everyone is permitted to pitch in. If you believe you have anything to add to the discussion, please do, but do try to keep this on track and problem-oriented, otherwise we'll never get off the drawing board. Part 3: What does it entail? The following are the proposed additions to this new, centralized SOP: Security Job SOP; (added by Necaladun before he took his leave) Engineering Job SOP; Medical Job SOP; Service Job SOP; Supply Job SOP; Science Job SOP (finalized!) In addition to the basic SOP for each Department, I also propose: Departmental SOP (as in, general guidelines for each Department that everyone should follow); Command SOP (in-depth SOP for each member of Command, not in Guideline form); Legal SOP (standardization of Legal procedures and the action of the Legal sub-Department); A revised General SOP, for each Color Code. This will include Safety Regulations As you can see, this is a rather big project and, as such, will be tackled in small stages. At each point, the completed section of SOP will be crossed out, and a notification written. At the end of the journey, a single, massive Standard Operating Procedure page will be added to the wiki, with all the above SOPs for everyone to look at. In addition, of course, to their own specific pages. And now, you've reached the end of the page. It's time to start, ladies and gentlemen.

42 is the answer to Life, the Universe and Everything.

My one gripe with the lore would be the transition from "Oral tradition, disorganized pockets of Vulpkanin" to "Suddenly centralized under a nebulous OWG with massive industrial boost". Then again, Willing Suspension of Disbelief, no one wants to come up with a full sociological history of a fictional species, and allows for personal interpretation.

Then you're kinda doing it wrong. That's not the intended purpose of the Rep at all.

From a purely IC perspective, the Representative is supposed to operate outside CoC, as a field agent of NanoTrasen. As such, it does kinda make sense that they have a CC stamp. They're supposed to be people trusted by CC to carry on their policy and make sure things get done, so they have their "blessing", so to speak. From a gameplay perspective, they're a karma role that, due to their nature, only really attracts and maintains people interested in paperwork-based RP, so letting them have a nice little official CC stamp would make sense. Carries weight.

I wasn't going to post here, due to the nature of what DZD said, but I would like to point out a couple of things. First off, no, I don't go to the Git. I'm not a coder, I have no idea how code works, and I trust the Maintainers/Coders to be sane, as I have no reason to believe otherwise. As such: And the number shrinks even more when you consider the majority of those forum accounts are either one-shots for ban appeals, troll accounts, people who aren't here, people who aren't interested in code and people who don't actually contribute and just have an account on standby for whenever, or only participate in Civilian's Days, or any of that section. Yes, these are all ways to contribute to the community, but believe or not, most people aren't interested in discussing changes to the codebase, and trust the Maintainers and Headmins to do their job properly. I'm going to assume you mean there were 170,000 deaths in the year of 2015, which would be a nice estimate. If so, should I point out how that is a ridiculous way of estimating the total number of characters, considering how many times a single character dies? And if that's not what you meant, here's a coder: So yes, the death table is an incredibly poor and unreliable way of ascertaining how many characters exist, which invalidates your entire argument from this point forward. But I'll continue. You also have no way of figuring out how many characters there are per player, but kudos for using the "best" possible outcome of 10 per player. Still, unreliable, invalidates the calculations. Refer to the above statement. And the above above statement because, surprise surprise, some people don't care about code, and most people aren't qualified to discuss it. Believe it or not, having everyone go to the Git would be a terribad bloody idea, because not everyone knows what the hell they're talking about, and not everyone understands code. And once again, above statement. I should also point out, currently, 5 players have the actual power to do anything on the GitHub, 3 Maintainers and 2 Heads of Staff. Because while we do take into account valid criticism, these are still the people that are entrusted with maintaining the codebase. Why yes, not all GitHub accounts are created equal. Imagine that. No. Just no. No one's vote counts for anyone else's (and I dearly hope that 20,000 player figure is hyperbole. And even if it is, bad extrapolation is bad). The forum and the GitHub are all publicly available to anyone who wants to go there. And I know exactly what you're going to use as a counter-argument, to which I say: 1) There's a Changelog button the same size as the Forum button in-game; 2) Most people don't want to discuss code At the end of the day, the Maintainers and Headmins make decisions based on what they believe would improve the game experience for the playerbase, which is information that they gather based on: 1) Yes, forum and GitHub posts, but also: 2) In-game experience; 3) Direct contact with the community; 4) Second-hand accounts from players and Staff; 5) Contact with the Staff and their own experiences in all these points. This isn't a simple numbers game. If a Maintainer has said no, odds are it was either a bad idea, a badly implemented idea, or something that is incompatible with current code. No, there isn't a big bad conspiracy out to crush the players so we can sit on our thrones built from skulls. Not all ideas are good ideas. Also, the ultimate well-being of the community is what runs the server. That's why, even when unlisted, Paradise is still peaking at 70+ during weekends on peak hour. Guess the system's working.

Pretty much. If the issue is DNC notices not being followed, just leave the corpses inside a body bag in the Execution Room and do not let them out. Relatively simple.

As the person behind the current Sec SOP, no, it's not against Departmental Sec SOP to have tasers on your armor/belt/pocket/whatever. Anyone who says otherwise is wrong and/or looking at outdated SOP.

Kidnapping isn't technically in Space Law. Personally, I classify it under assault. I'll get to work on that.

Pretty much how I view ERT, but that doesn't stop every single one of them from being a complete comdom who tries to arrest the captain. The difference is that the ERT aren't bodyguards, they're an Emergency Response Team. They detain ultimate authority over whatever they need to do, so long as it's to do with the emergency they were called over. If they need to arrest the Captain? They are fully permitted to do so. The Blueshield operates outside COC. The ERT supersedes COC.

Rust-proof coating. Worth every penny.

As is, the Blueshield operates outside of standard Chain of Command, and doesn't hold authority anywhere. A counterpoint to that is that no one really has any authority over them as long as they're doing their job right. They've been appointed by CC directly to be bodyguards aaaaaand... that's it. The "you answer to the NT Rep" part almost never comes into play, but is there to remind the Blueshield that, in case of an emergency, the Rep, being NanoTrasen's agent on the field, should be the one they defer to.

;w;

I fucking love you.

DANG right

376. May no longer volunteer to handle internal disputes aboard the Cyberiad; 377. May no longer address members of the Space Wizards Federation as I would a "two bit tramp" when out clubbing; 378. May not flirt with members of the Space Wizards Federation; 379. May not slap the asses of Archmages of the Space Wizards Federation; 379a. May not "accidentally" trip onto them either; 379b. May not do the above with any member of the Space Wizards Federation; 380. "I was a statue" is not an appropriate excuse to miss work; 380a. Even if it was true; 381. There is no such thing as a "Church of the Holy Jenkins", and I should not begin my own; 382. I am not a "Fleshy Weeping Angel"; 383. I am also not "Space Jesus reborn"; 384. May no longer requisition Medical RIG Suits if I don't plan on using them; 385. I should not be glad that I forced the deployment of a Witch Hunter ERT; 385a. Even if everyone agreed they were cool as shit; 386. I may not maintain correspondence with anyone capable of gibbing me as an afterthought; 387. I may not refer to myself as Jenkins the Xth, regardless of how true it may be; 388. I do not need a crossbow; 389. I do not need a cool sword with ritualistic runes either; 390. I should stop pretending I'm part of ERT Zeroth Niner; 391. My workplace is not a good place for posters celebrating the awesomeness of ERT Zeroth Niner; 392. I should probably get a hobby outside work; 393. I may not use telepathic powers to provoke religious epiphanies; 394. I may not use telekinetic powers to establish myself as a "Grand Wizard" when handling less advanced civilizations; 395. The Space Wizards Federation is labelled an official Enemy of the Corporation, and I should not refer to them as "Sexy Witch Central"; 396. There is absolutely no need for me to refer to Comms Officer Jenkins in the third person; 397. I should not be proud that this list has hit 3 digits; 398. I may not "accidentally forget" memetic cognitohazards in e-mails sent to the Science Division; 399. May not fill the NTV Charon with rubber skeletons and play "Highway to Hell" during the whole voyage; 400. May not divert the mining shuttle to the middle of the bar just to prove I can

Portugal, the land of beer, football, wine and debt.

351. Sharpened pencils do not count as "Improvised Weaponry", no matter how pointy I can make them; 351a. Even if I sharpen them to a single digit molecule count; 352. The NXS Klapaucius is not my personal cellphone; 353. The NTV Charon is not to be referred to as "The Deathboat"; 354. The Icarus is not intentionally creating malfunctioning drones and sending them to the Cyberiad as a "test of skill", and I should stop telling people that; 355. Sending screamers disguised as prisoner records over to Security during an active crisis is incredibly immature and I should be ashamed of myself for laughing so hard; 356. I may not undercut the Magistrate's authority on account of them being a Vox; 356a. Even if company policy allows it and no one knows how the hell a Vox got assigned as a Magistrate; 357. Superintendent Brennan is not "a bajillion years old", and I should not tell new Comms personnel that; 358. No matter what my job description says, I must now always confer with a superior at least two Clearance Levels above my own before I respond to anything; 359. Even if it currently broken, may not substitute the General Announcement sound cue with a recording of myself; 360. "Skrell Gone Wild" is not appropriate "morale booster" material; 361. I may not refer to Vox as "Midget Emus"; 362. "It sounded like a great idea" is no longer an adequate response for anything; 363. Death is not the beginning; 364. May not inject prisoners under interrogation with cryogenic sludge and tell them to "Stay cool"; 365. Love, while a good sentiment, should not be anywhere near the words "Xenomorph" and "Engineering"; 366. While company policy tolerates religious worship of the Gravitational Singularity, may not actively recruit new converts; 367. "Seven pints of whiskey" is not a valid medical prescription for cluster headaches; 367a. Even if it works; 368. Genetics Research is a highly complex, delicate and expensive field of Science, not "Superpower Lottery"; 369. May not refer to Amber-Level Emergency Response Teams as "Redshirts"; 370. Likewise, may not refer to the non-existent Deathsquad as "The A-Team"; 371. May not refer to mutant vines as "Goat Feed"; 372. Money, not love, makes the world go round, and I should remember that the next time I get a paycheck; 373. No longer allowed to poke around in the archives for information regarding [CLASSIFIED - CLASS DELTA]; 374. Professor [CLASSIFIED - CLASS EPSILON] is not to be referred to as "The Witch Doctah"; 375. The XM-13 Heavy Laser Cannon is not to be used as an improvised lighter

Personally, since now the Space Loop works, I'd just route waste through it rather than use the Freezers, unless you're using a Heat Exchanger setup and/or Science does their jobs.

The original Paddywagon. Parts were harvested from a flatbed truck, two tractors and an abandoned RV. Runs off a V6 diesel engine I scavenged from a tractor and possesses all the amenities required for a true on-the-go post-apocalyptic experience, such as a kitchen, welder station and meth chemical lab. Six Cameras make sure all the angles are covered. The second incarnation of the Paddywagon. This one had double layered heavy boards with military composite plating attached to them, four extra wheels, two extra diesel tanks, more cargo compartments and, best of all, a battering ram. Upgraded to eight cameras. The final incarnation of the Paddywagon. All the crafting stations, slightly less cargo space, but still enough, and redesigned to fit general purpose needs. This one is a lot boxier, has heavy frames all around, 10 cameras and only a single reinforced windshield, in addition to a mounted 120mm AT Launcher and a Scorpion Ballista. It is, for all intents and purposes, an APC RV. Perhaps the best part about it is, unlike the previous Paddywagons, which ran on Diesel that I fabricated out of shrooms and peaches, this one runs on three large electric motors, topping a safe 145 Km/h for a double-layered, military-armored, dual-gunned mobile house.

This design is horribly inefficient and, worst of all, cannot be fueled by ethanol brewed from rotten peaches and cooking oil brewed from the remains of slain fungaloids. Paddywagon all the way. I'll be posting a pic of it when I get back home, because sweet Jesus, that was a nice car.

Company policy requires that I say I'm not allowed to do that either.

326. I may not use the Gravitational Catapults in the Emergency Response Team Mech Bay as improvised paintball guns: 327. Even if company policy allows it, may not respond to anything with "RTFM"; 328. Land mines are not "bouncy and fun"; 329. I may not use my green eyes as proof of my "Oirish" descent; 330. May no longer access the NXS Klapaucius' mainframe to play "Best of Queen", no matter how much the crew requests it; 330a. Even if the Superintendent also asks for it; 331. When slapping someone with a glove, it should not be weighted; 332. There is absolutely no reason for me to "reassign" a blacksmith to the Cyberiad; 333. May not tell the Clown that the Honkmother isn't real; 334. I may not send a shipment of scythes when asked to help with a Blob Organism; 335. Even though zombies may be real, there is no need for me to preemptively issue a hundred copies of the Zombie Survival Guide to the crew, "just in case"; 336. Even though company policy allows it, may no longer use arachnophobia as an excuse not to help kill giant spiders; 337. There is no such thing as a "Plasma Bazooka", and I should not try to build one; 337a. Nor should I bribe Science to do so for me; 338. X-Ray Rifles are not to be used to scan for broken bones; 339. I may not channel Dirty Harry when within 20 feet of any firearm; 340. "Duck and Cover", while entirely appropriate, is still not an adequate response when informed of a Syndicate Strike Team; 341. May not refer to the Head of Security as any of the following: "Stalin", "Chief Dictator", "Head of Shitcurity", "Beret Placeholder" or "Trench Monkey"; 342. May not taunt the Chief Engineer with a Supermatter Crate filled with a Nucleation; 342a. Nucleations should not be treated as pranking implements; 343. Playing "Red Light, Green Light" with a Weeping Angel is not an acceptable idea for a company picnic; 344. May not suggest "Eye for an eye" or any variation thereof whenever a Geneticist accidentally turns someone into a small animal; 345. May not install a radio transmitter set to the Common Communications channel in the Clown's shoes; 346. May not steal the mime's beret, then paint it in rainbow stripes; 347. May not declare Toxins to be a "condemned area" whenever it gets blown up again; 347a. Even if everyone involved thinks it's a good idea; 348. May not swap the labels on the Atmospherics Storage Tanks; 349. While delicious, will not encourage the Chef to turn Coffee the Crab into burgers; 350. The Crematorium may not be used to roast marshmallows; 350a. Doubly so if it's currently being used to cremate a Changeling

Get it? It's a catfish.