TullyBBurnalot

Preface: Check out Skippy's List and Things Mr. Welch can no longer do during an RPG. Because hey, we can do this too, can't we? Will come in installments of 25. I may not address any member of Command as a "Comdom" during official communications, no matter how true it may be; I no longer have the authority to fire anyone on the grounds of their perceived stupidity, regardless of whether or not it's actually true; I may not bribe other Central Command officials into doing it for me with things I found going through internal communication logs; I may no longer access internal communication logs five access levels above my own just because the Superintendent left the password written on a post-it; Red Level Emergency Response Teams are not an adequate response to the Captain losing his energy gun; Telling a newly hired Engineer to "wing it" is not an appropriate response when questioned about Singularity Containment Procedures, no matter how hilarious the results; Even though company policy allows it, I may no longer tell the Representative to "inspect the clown's level of humor"; Nor am I allowed to tell the Head of Security to do the same; I may no longer send food shipments to the station that contain any of the following: tacos, enchiladas, cabbages, potatoes, any kind of alcoholic beverage, fruit or toddlers; "They were taking too long" is not an appropriate reason to scramble a Gamma Level Emergency Response Team ten minutes into the shift; A.L.I.C.E. is not my personal PDA; I may not offer "premium tours" of Central Command in exchange for cash payments; I may not scare the interns by telling them anything verifiably true about the Cyberiad; I may not tell freshly minted Representatives "God help you" or any variation thereof; I may not respond to direct Communications Console Messages with "I don't see a stamp here"; Even though company policy allows it, I may no longer ask the Bartender to mix me a drink, then take one of the shuttles to go get it; I am no longer allowed within fifty feet of the High-Precision Bluespace Needle Array, even if I did manage to tap a beer keg without calibrating it the first time; I may no longer ask Jayson Hawke if he "goes Commando"; Even though company policy allows it, I am no longer authorized to give the Bluespace RnD Division anything that could potentially create a localized temporal distortion; I may not refer to the Cult of Nar-Sie as "the emo kids with the weird scribbly things" in official communications; Similarly, I may not refer to Vampires as "bloodsuckers with an attitude"; Even though company policy allows it, I may no longer ask the Chief Medical Officer to "make us an Übermensch"; RIG Suits are highly experimental, expensive prototype technology, not "privacy suits"; I may not shut down Telecomms again because the crew wouldn't shut up about pizzas; I may not refer to the Chaplain's deity as "Space Jesus", unless their deity actually is Space Jesus

11 dreams crushed horribly.

GG Xenostation 13.

COUNT, DARNIT!

My full support for this. It'd be nice to have some sort of "Company Goals" or something like it, not just because it'd help shape the way that departments run, but also because I may or may not constantly need money for chow mein.

Right, fuller reply here since that last one was done in between classes while eating a pastry. Faxes are, by their very definition, a way for the crew, in general, to contact Central Command via an (admittedly formal) easy way. They're supposed to contain substantial (but not excessive) amounts of information and, above all, are there either to alert Central Command to something that they need to be alerted to, or to request further information/advice whenever there's a stalemate going on. In addition, you can literally send as many faxes as you like so long as you have a fax machine. Yes, sending a message to Central Command is on a cooldown, but it's only a couple of minutes, and you can use another fax machine in the meantime. Not to mention, faxes can come from literally anyone. Hell, I've had janitors file formal complaints against the crew, they just happened to give their written complaint to an IAA who then signed and stamped it. Communications Console messages are much different. Firstly, as stated, they're Captain-level access only. While any member of Command and the IAAs have fax access, only the Captain has access to the Comm Console CC Message. This is meant to be the equivalent of, say, a Captain on the field phoning/radioing his HQ. Rather than a formal means of communication between corporate entities, it's a direct message being transmitted between a central entity and a person they appointed to handle things on their behalf and, as such, isn't subject to the same rules. Comms Console CC Messages aren't meant to be formal, or long winded. Rather, they're supposed to be short, concise messages that are sent only if absolutely required, hence the long-ass cooldown, to warn Central Command of something that just can't wait for fax approval. Another big difference is that all Comms Console CC Messages have a BSA button attached to their chat box prompt. So if you send a CC Message reading, say, "FUCK NANOTRASEN BITCHES LONG LIVE THE SYNDICATE", you may want to duck. Not really though, we don't do that.

Well, firstly, those messages are Captain-level only. Secondly, being on a noticeable cooldown, they're usually (or should be) reserved for "GUYS GUYS WE HAVE SOMETHING REALLY IMPORTANT HERE GUYS!!" situations, such as complete station breakdown, particularly aggressive antags and the like.

Generally, anything having to do with SOP is due for a complete overhaul/revamp. Neca and me were working on it before he [REDACTED], hence the SOP Guidelines for Security. When Neca comes back, most, if not all, of SOP is getting changed, so hold off on it for now. Also everyone on the Staff calls us nerds for enjoying lawyering SOP. We'll show them, won't we Pennywise...

This was probably the most anti-climactic and dissapointing Nuke Ops round ever. Deadchat was following the nukies when they infiltrated the Incinerator and just waiting to see what would happen... ... ... cue random greytide space lubing the hallway and all the nuke ops dying in 2 minutes because "lol lube". It wasn't even funny. It wasn't even entertaining. It really was just dissapointing.

As much as I hate to bring up this argument, you're talking about logic in a game where people willingly turn themselves into slimes, a single slab of meat can be made into 5 steaks because !!!SCIENCE!!! and the main source of power for the station is, for all intents and purposes, a fucking black hole. Besides, as many people have pointed out, Nations 2.0 is an objectively better gamemode than Old Nations. The removal of the CTF element has actually forced people to interact meaningfully with one another, and establish relations based on these interactions. That said, screw Hulkbay.

Foreword: Knowing BB Code is not so much a bonus as it is a requirement. So, you've decided to fax Central Command and hope for the best. Well then, here are some pointers on how to do so properly. Part 1: What are faxes? Faxes are paper-based communications sent from any fax machine on the station to either another fax machine or Central Command. You write on a piece of paper, stick it into a fax machine, select your desired destination, and BAM! You're done. They are usually reserved for official communiqués, be they CoC orders, departmental audits, staff complaints or even demotion/arrest orders. For the purpose of this guide, we're assuming you are faxing Central Command. For starters, here's where you can find a fax machine: Any Head of Staff Office, including the Head of Personnel and Captain; The NanoTrasen Representative's office; The Magistrate's office; The Internal Affairs office In addition, only members of Command and the IAAs can actually use the fax machines. Everyone else is locked out of them by default. As you can see, access to them is quite limited, and it should. Faxes carry with them a heavy aura of authority and finality, and a well written fax can make or break someone's entire shift. The sole exception to this level of access would be the fax machine in the IA office, which often sees more interdepartmental activity. However, you want to know how to properly fax Central Command. Well, it's time for a little OOC note. Every fax you send to Central Command is seen by Administrators, ranked Game Admin or above. These faxes are listed in the Fax Panel, along with the title, time it was sent, the person who sent it, and a nifty little "Reply" button. We can also see interdepartmental faxes, but those are beyond our jurisdiction. As such, when you fax Central Command, you are faxing the Administrators, and when you receive a response from Central Command, that's our word in it. What does this mean ICly, however? Well, Central Command (or the NAS Trurl if you want to be technical about it) is the main hub of activity that the NSS Cyberiad (the station you're on) is associated with. They handle several other stations in the systems around them, and handle all the administrative burden associated with that (NAS stands for NanoTrasen Administrative Station). When you fax Central Command, you are essentially calling upon the highest IC authority you can muster. It's the equivalent of someone in the US faxing Barack Obama (or whoever's President when you read this). Central Command's decision on something is final, and should be treated as such. Central Command communications, as was noted already, can make or break someone's entire shift. Comdoms can be demoted, great people can be promoted, and even Karma jobs can be circumvented if so required/desired. Whenever there's a stalemate in Command, Central Command faxes break it. Whenever the Magistrate is being ignored for no good reason, Central Command shouts louder. Whenever the Representative finds a severe breach of SOP, Central Command raises their eyebrow. What I'm trying to get across here is that Central Command is not a toy, nor a tool, and should not be treated as such. "I'ma fax CC" should never be used as a threat, and demanding things from CC should not (normally) be done. But more on that later. For now... Part 2: The Title Yes, this is important enough to warrant its own section. The title you give your fax is the first thing we look at when we open the Fax Panel, and appears on our chat box whenever you send a fax over to Central Command. Here's a couple of things that should not be in your fax's title: paper; all lowercase letters; CAPS LOCK IS CRUISE CONTROL FOR COOL; Incredibly winding, pointless diatribes that seek to explain everything that could possibly be explained but just end up being ignored because of how text parsing works; "FUCKING SHTICURITY!!!" or any variation thereof; butts You get the point. Keep your fax's title as short and concise as possible, so that we can get an idea of what's going to be in there before even opening it. Part 3: Formatting Hey, remember this? Yeah. BB Code denotes everything that can be used to format your text, just like in Microsoft Word or Wordpad. A few examples: creates a neat little horizontal line that can be used to separate blocks of text; [logo] creates a NanoTrasen logo; [large] lets you shout in writing And many more. BB Code is quick to learn, if not to type, and it really adds flavour and substance to your faxes. Why is this important, you ask? Well, bluntly put, your chances of getting a proper response go up the more formatted your fax is. Remember when I said you faxing Central Command would be like a US citizen faxing Barack Obama? Well, what do you think would happen if Barack Obama received a piece of paper that wasn't signed, or stamped, and contained this message: A response, if it even existed, would most likely be them telling you to take your time to write a proper message. If you fax Central Command, it is expected that you're doing so with utmost professionalism, and that involves not sending a wall of text with absolutely no formatting whatsoever, no signature and no stamp. The importance of signatures and stamps cannot be overstated. Why? Well, Central Command is not omniscient. Even though the Administrators can see (or find out) everything going on in the round, Central Command cannot. Faxing Central Command should not be like sending an Ahelp. Do not assume that Central Command "just knows". If you send us a fax with no signature and no stamp, how are we to know someone didn't just break into your office and faxed Central? Having a piece of paper signed and stamped by you tells us that you did, indeed, send the fax (or that someone at least is really good at forgeries), and you'll actually get a proper response. As for the formatting itself, well, simply put, it's easier on the eyes, and it's prettier. Having to sit and stare at a gigantic wall of text that just keeps going without any sort of formatting whatsoever is painful, boring, and just looks sloppy. If you're taking the time to fax Central Command, take the time to make your faxes look official, and not a hastily scribbled note at the end of an exam. Part 4: The Message Now we reach the crux of the matter. What you're actually telling Central Command. Now, as stated before, faxes are supposed to be official communiqués, and are expected to be permeated with the utmost professionalism. This is because Central Command, in all their power, expects some level of sanity from the people they give fax machines to. What does this mean? Well, consider the following: you're aboard a futuristic space station that can, among other things, create physics-defying handbags, harness electrical power from a contained black hole, craft heavily armed military mechs, and have clown VS mime showdowns. Should you really be faxing Central Command to complain about Security insulting prisoners? Don't get me wrong, there are legitimate grievances to be had regarding IC behaviour. However, Central Command, being the final authority on pretty much anything, should only be contacted about important stuff and, most importantly, stuff that cannot be fixed ICly. This includes any situation where the relevant Head of Staff is ignoring SOP/Space Law and is refusing to actually address issues, forcing you to go over their head. If the situation can be handled internally, it should be. Speak to people, have reasonable discourses with them, and try and solve the situation then and there. If that fails, then get the fax machine. This goes for pretty much every complaint or investigation handled by whoever writes the fax. Central Command should only be contacted over staff complaints if: The complaint is actually valid; You have reasonable evidence backing it up; Assuming a and b, the relevant Head of Staff isn't listening to you Should all three conditions be met, a fax to Central Command would be the best course of action. If, however, the relevant Head of Staff is willing to cooperate with you, keep it internally. It adds to the overall level of RP and actually lets you do something against bad behaviour. That said, sanity please. If you complain about Security manhandling prisoners when there's an active, hostile cult on the station, it's Code Red and there's an ERT on the field, you're most likely getting ignored/slammed down hard. Context is paramount. When it comes to departmental audits or other similar investigations, having a detailed description of how every Department is doing will go miles towards grabbing attention to your message, will increase the chances of you getting a reply, and will generally make you feel incredibly useful. That said, don't go overboard and write a small novel detailing every last thing every last crewmember is doing. Keep it concise, keep it to the point, and note important details (such as a particularly good/bad crewmember) if needed. Part 5: Fax Ettiquete Oh boy, here we go. Most of this section will be OOC, and directed at the players, not the characters. First off, respect. Central Command is not a toy, nor is it a tool. Central Command is not your stick to wield, and is not your weapon for when you want to comdom around and try and pretend you have authority you do not have. Central Command is, for all intents and purposes, your boss. What I mean by this is that you shouldn't go around threatening to send faxes whenever you want to boss around people, or when you want to throw your weight around. This goes double for the IAAs and the Representative, who have no actual authority and are merely there as advisors/investigators. "I'MA GO FAX CC AND DEMOTE U" is a shitty attitude to have, and will most likely get you stonewalled by Central Command if you actually make good on your threats. Do not make demands of Central Command. Do not fax us demanding to demote someone, or to promote someone else. You may suggest doing so, amidst a well detailed report with reasonable evidence and information to back up your suggestion. But never demand it. You wouldn't walk up to your boss and yell out "I want you to fire Jenkins this instant, he smells funny!", would you? (if you answered yes, wat, just wat? Really?) As for the tone, we do not expect you to remain detached and clinical (this isn't the SCP Foundation, after all, despite what the level of gruesomeness might imply), but we expect you to remain professional and formal. Don't speak to Central Command like you would to a coworker, but rather how you would speak with a company rep, or with Internal Affairs at an actual office. You won't get slammed in the face if you talk to Central Command like a schoolyard friend, but you most certainly will receive a poignant reminder of what's expected of you. Do not keep sending the same fax over and over every few minutes in order to "bump" it. If you sent a fax that never got answered to, either the Administrators believed it wasn't worth a response, or they missed it (which is entirely possible, the fax notification on the chat box is hilariously easy to miss). A quick Ahelp fixes that, but please don't keep bwoinking us with "REPLY TO FAX PLOX" every few seconds. Lastly, and to finish off this guide on a high note, no butts. Never fax butts. It is a time honoured tradition to BSA anyone who faxes butts to Central Command, and we do so love the sound of explosions.

And it worked.

... You, sir, are amazing. I applaud you, your efforts, your creation, and your absolute dedication to Atmosia's cause. You are one of the few that make me proud to have ever learned how to work the piping system. You are one magnificent fucking bastard. Infinite karma for you, you absolutely deserve every last bit of it. ---end tearful salute--- For realsies now, WOW, this is good. I haven't had the time to properly experiment with the Turbine, but I'm glad someone actually did it, and got it to work fantastically. This is actually amazing. I'll probably be making an Atmospherics Guide V3, with my latest setup, which does include Heat Exchangers and plasma. Hell, the V2 was done before I realized LINDA actually made the Space Loop useful.

Alternatively, if you did bone repair, then internal organ repair, you don't need to close them up and open again.

*Crank.

GOD. FUCKING. DAMNIT. NO. ERP!!!

MARIACHI! ASSEMBLEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

MARIACHI TIME! The band assembles! Unknown to many, Bob Santos is a distant descendant of Sting! The fabled Antonio Llama, the best singer this side of Spexico!

3 dakkas.

This is literally the most adorable thing I've ever seen. That fucking dog's face. Sax is best puppy. BEST PUPPEH.

Are you dissin' the wig?

So you just spent 45 Karma points and got yourself the single most expensive job on the list, the Magistrate. You probably did this so you could lord all over the nerdlings in Security and rule it like your own personal fiefdom while you let your metabuddies run wild. If so, don't worry: you have been jobbanned already. For those of you who actually want to do your jobs, here's how you go about it: Section 1: Your Job The Magistrate is the single most expensive Karma job available for unlocking, and with good reason. Barring direct orders from Central Command (which rarely get issued, for good reason), he or she is the ultimate authority on Space Law in any given round. Unlike other jobs, which have all sorts of "if"s and "but"s, this is unconditional. No one outranks you when it comes to Space Law. Period. Ever. In perpetuity. Anyone who says otherwise is either misinformed, lying, or being a shitter/comdom. You, as the Magistrate, wield ultimate supreme authority on all matters concerning Space Law. What this means is, if it is in any way concerned with criminal sentences (up to and including executions), you have the authority to overrule anyone except Central Command. For that exact reason, you are under heavy scrutiny at all times. Magistrates caught abusing Space Law or just being generally inept at it don't last long. If you bought this job, it is assumed that you know Space Law inside out, have experience working with Security, are fully capable and able to stand up to regular shittery, and can keep a cool head in all circumstances. You are expected to be the One Sane Man. Anything less is unacceptable. Standard Operating Procedure is outside of your jurisdiction, and just like everyone else, you are bound to it. You hold supreme authority on all matters concerning Space Law. Standard Operating Procedure should be left to the care of the Internal Affairs Agents and the NanoTrasen Representative. It is, after all, their job. You may also not threaten people with demotions as, again, this falls under Standard Operating Procedure. That said, you have access to Command Comms, so if you honestly think someone should be demoted, make your case there. As it stands, you may be the last word when it comes to Space Law, but that's about it. Powerful, but limited. As such, complete knowledge and mastery of Space Law is expected, as is a working knowledge of Standard Operating Procedure. Section 2: Enforcing the Law Your job is not to arrest people. In fact, doing so is a breach of Standard Operating Procedure, and is liable to get you disciplined or even fired. You are a judge, not an officer, and should confine yourself to handling sentencing, not the field work. As such, your main area of operations is the Brig, most notably the Processing Room. While I do not recommend you involve yourself with every last little crime, since most of the time Security is fully capable of dealing with it, keeping an ear to the ground and making sure Security is doing their jobs properly does not hurt. Stick around the Brig and get a taste for how the Officers, Warden and Head of Security are handling prisoners and their sentences. Provide tips where correction is needed, or hammer down the gavel wherever Security just utterly fails. Remember, they do not outrank you when it comes to Space Law. If the Magistrate says someone's sentence is X, Security has precisely zero legitimacy to contest that decision, barring of course circumstances where the verdict flies in the face of conventional logic. If Security refuses to listen to you, contact the Head of Security and get them to put their department in line. If the Head of Security cannot, or does not, do so, contact the Captain. Failing that, the NanoTrasen Representative. If all else fails, and everyone is ignoring you for no good reason, you have a fax machine in your office. The Fax Machine is your direct hotline to Central Command, or, in a more practical sense, the Administrators currently online. All faxes are to be done in-character and as absolutely professional as possible, since poorly formatted or worded faxes are quite likely to receive a "Yeah, no" response. You are a NanoTrasen appointed judge, and it is expected that your communiqués stand a cut above everyone else's. Be concise, be impartial, be informative. Tell Central Command exactly what happened without an excess of details. Do not make demands in your faxes, I cannot stress this enough. Demanding Central Command do something is a surefire way of getting sidelined immediately. Stick to informing Central Command about what's going on and requesting further aid, if possible. Should you happen to be on the receiving end of "MAGISTRATE HAS NO AUTHORITY FUCK" comdomry, feel free to tell us that (in other words, obviously). Should Security actually listen to you, let them handle most minor and medium crimes. Major crimes you should take a more active role in, especially when it comes to Assault of an Officer. Make sure that all the evidence is properly collected, that the person isn't on the receiving end of Shitcurity, and that what they actually did matches with what Security said they did. To this end, the Detective is one of your best friends. As soon as all evidence is collected, issue a verdict. I won't get into the details of sentence stacking, seeing as that's bare minimum Space Law knowledge and is available in the wiki. Do note that Security and Command are not above, or immune to, Space Law. If anyone in Command or Security commits a crime, it is not only your right, but also your duty to make sure they are punished for it. This is especially complicated if it's a high-ranking member of Command, such as the Captain, who will almost never agree to being brigged regardless of the circumstances. The process, however, is simple: Issue a sentence; Wait for Security to arrest said person; If Security does not act, warn Command, and remind Security to arrest said person; If Security still does not act, fax Central Command Drastic measures such as these are necessary when sentencing members of Security and Command, seeing as, if they committed a crime in the first place, they're not likely to be the cooperative kind, and both departments have a bad case of refusing to address internal issues. Just remember: provided you have the evidence to back up your sentence, you are in the right. Zero discussion. Section 3: Internal Affairs Despite being listed as part of Security, the Internal Affairs Agents answer to you, and you alone. Together, you form an impromptu "sub-department". Let's call it Justice and Law. While your job is to apply Space Law to the best of your ability, the IAA's job is to make sure that Space Law and Standard Operating Procedure are being followed properly. While it is a good idea to keep an active role in Security proceedings yourself, the IAA is the one who should be handling the actual "auditing", so to speak. While they do not possess any authority themselves, a written report can go a long way towards ensuring proper procedure is being followed. Make sure to keep in touch with your IAAs during the shift, and have them report back to you if they found anything worth mentioning. On a similar note, you and the NanoTrasen Representative should be best buddies. Both of you answer directly to Central Command and operate outside the traditional Chain of Command. Despite what dozens of Craptains may have suggested to you in the past, neither you, nor the IAAs, nor the NT Rep actually answer to him. The IAAs answer to you, who alongside the NT Rep answer to Central Command. The main difference here is that while you have direct, actual authority over all matters concerning Space Law, the NT Rep does not possess any actual authority, and is instead expected to act as an advisor and auditor, making sure that Standard Operating Procedure is being followed. That said, they are the ones most expected to be sending faxes over to Central Command, so if you have a legitimate grievance with Command, or if Command/Security are ignoring you, make sure to talk to the NT Rep before sending a fax yourself. In addition, working in tandem with them and maintaining an active communication channel (via PDA, most likely) is a great way of ensuring the station runs like clockwork. Section 4: Capital Crimes and Antagonists Capital Crimes are when your expertise with Space Law must shine above everyone else's. Capital Crimes are punishable in the following ways: Permanent imprisonment in the Permabrig; Permanent imprisonment in the Labor Camp; Execution; Cyborgization (preferably should be done following a regular execution) In addition, the following are the ONLY legal means of execution (assuming lethal force was not used on the field, as permitted by Standard Operating Procedure under certain circumstances): Electric Chair; Lethal Injection (the actual injections aren't immediately lethal, so you may need help from Chemistry/Science); Firing Squad (should be done in the Firing Range) No other means of execution are permitted. Forced Cyborgization is acceptable, but I would personally recommend doing it after a regular execution. Forcefully removing someone's brain while they are alive falls under the "cruel and unusual" category, and should really be avoided. Also, be aware that only you or the Captain may authorize an execution, and even then you are perfectly capable of overruling them. The same happens for permanent imprisonment sentences. That said, executions should not be your go-to default solution for all Capital Crimes, despite technically speaking it being perfectly legal. Remember that the other person is also trying to have fun playing the game, and immediately executing them because "MUH VALIDS" is incredibly poor form. Just because you can order their execution doesn't mean you should. Cooperative prisoners should be sent to the Permabrig, or maybe even the Labor Camp so they have something to do for the rest of the shift, rather than sticking around in deadchat. Always take into consideration what the person actually did, not what they are, when handing out a sentence to a Capital Crime. Stole the Hand Teleporter with an emag? Permanent imprisonment would be best. Murdered five people with a chainsaw? Zappy zap. Just remember: no one likes a hanging judge. Be lawful, yes, but be just. Section 5: Consequences No doubt during this guide you were left with the idea that the Magistrate is "TEH SUPER HAXXOR BEST MLG SPESS LAW DOOD". While to some extent that sentiment is correct, I would like to bring your attention to two things: 1) The Magistrate costs 45 Karma for a reason; 2) You yourself are not above Space Law or Standard Operating Procedure As mentioned above, you are not only supposed, but also expected to be, the sane one. You are supposed to be the person that anyone can go to in order to make sure Justice is served properly. In many respects, you are the anchor that holds down Shitcurity. As such, deviating from this path and proceeding to abuse your position will end messily. Pardoning your metabuddies, ignoring crimes done by Command/Security, breaking the law yourself or, worse yet, trying to overrule the Captain and pardoning yourself after a crime (and yes, this has happened to me before, and no, if you commit a crime as a Magistrate, you cannot pardon yourself) are just a few examples of how this job can be abused. So, a small warning: a Jobban is not where it stops. Purchasing the Magistrate and proceeding to abuse it to such a degree that it gets you banned from that job will leave a gigantic black stain on your permanent record, not to mention most likely sour people's impressions of you. Magistrates are expected to be great roleplayers, in addition to knowing Space Law inside out and ensuring Security acts decently. Do not disappoint.

13th Age: International Incident