Hairy Ban Jhankri

Oh, lawdy, that gif, lol. Can that be added under rule 16 as a link?

The Company of Myself. Interesting flash game.

So, I am not a computer guy, but, isn't that just a cached version of the forum you are getting, for when your connection goes offline?

This sounds like a more trust worthy and ethically minded version of the Death Collector

Why, thank you very much. If I am not mistaken, I put in a few others in there, as well. I am quite certain my most recent entry was by Dongle. It should be called Origins, or Preface, or something along those lines. It is quite a bit longer, but it perhaps may be a good read for clown or mime players. It is styled after the Bible, and Darwinian writings, in a way.

Let me see if I can maybe clear some stuff up, maybe give some insight. From where I stand, things look differently to me, often times. So, I want to open with a scenario that -very quickly- ran it's course as soon as it started. When the karma job of custom officer first opened, it seemed everybody rushed to unlock it, so that they too, could become the supreme asshole of the station. The first -20- sometimes less, often times more, with little exaggeration, minutes of every round, customs caused a medley of problems, inconveniences, and nuisances. With each new round, there would often be a new customs officer, as it seemed everybody felt they were the best customs officer, and rushed to ready up at round start, or apply for it at the start of each shift. Many players got job banned from customs, as simply put, they flat out -sucked- at it. Rather quickly, the customs hype, ran out. Seems most shifts, customs lays empty. Bare this in mind, as the topics are going to be steered in several directions. I will clarify in the end, however, if the ideas were presented in a more linear fashion, I do not think they will have the same effect. On the topic of races, there are a variety of races open to the public, for free. The races that cost karma are meant for more experienced roleplayers, who will likely know how to RP as those races, and hopefully will have a good understanding about the background of those races. An examination of each race provides many details that will entice different types of people. For example, some details may entice certain types of people to, let us agree on Vox, but, they may be steered away from, perhaps we shall agree on Greys. The races available, which are Slimes and Vox for 45, as they are decided to be the hardest to RP, the Greys, and Kidan, which are 30, and the last, which is the machine people, for 15. The most popular, so it seems, are all but Greys, being the least popular, and the Kidans, although at one time, the kidans were rather popular. We will explore more of this, later. The important thing to take away from here is, there are plenty of viable free races, yet many people opt for the most expensive unlockables. Back onto the topic of a variety of jobs. Barber, which is 5, is rarely touched. However, for the same price, at 5, Brig Physician seems to be growing in popularity. As a doctor assigned to the brig, they get not only medical access, but security, as well. Two other jobs, priced the same as each other, blueshield and NT Rep, are also growing in popularity. Blueshield is often times seen running errands, and the rep seen harping on heads about paperwork. Each have a hefty amount of access. However, the mechanic, which could be argued as still being a work in progress, is still in game, for the same price, is rarely touched. In fact, it seems a fair amount of rounds, somebody simply breaks in to make a pod for themselves. As a prediction, however, I simply do not know much about the roles, I will strongly assume that the new roles put in I assume today, which are the recruiter, and security pod pilot, will likely go rather unused. My guess may be the same for the ambassador jobs, as well, however I don't know what ambassadors will be tasked with. As a flip side, I will assume that magistrate will be rather popular, however, this simply may be a form of wishful thinking. Now, for all the explanations, and how it is all relevant, if the ideas have not coherently been pieced together as of yet. Karma is meant to keep the jobs with power from the people that shouldn't have them, but, the system assumes that people would logically provide karma to those who are best suited for karma jobs. It does not assume that the system can be manipulated. Many people have large amounts of karma, while others struggle. This, on the surface, may be assumed that those with copious amounts, are rather good roleplayers, however, if this is the case, roles such as barber would be abundant, and races such as Greys would be the most popular. Instead, it is observed that Vox and Slimes are rather popular, as well as brig physician and jobs with high access. For some food for thought, which would likely gather more karma? A funny, borderline stupid character who ends up saving the day, comically, or, a complete coward who does next to nothing, save for stealing and being a general nuisance for all involved? Perhaps another example, an energetic being who comically appears in random places, unannounced to deliver half witted news to the majority of the station, or perhaps a non intellectual being who is compliant, and simply does the menial tasks they are assigned? Karma is not about RP. It will not, does not, and can not promote RP. The player base is diluted, and will not provide any of the intended purposes for karma. The argument is that karma positions should be cheaper. Perhaps this may be true. Perhaps it is not. When races and jobs are used only for the access and racial abilities, sometimes at best, mediocre RP, karma simply delays the inevitable for the masses. There is a reason machine people immediately dropped off as soon as they became "under powered" with the implementation of overheating. This would be the same reason if Vox had the leap ability removed. Alternatively, slimes having some of the bonuses removed, or kidans bouncing off marauder fire being nerfed. The reps and blueshields are often times given free reign to do as they please. Should the magistrates be popular, I can only imagine them to simply be replaced by those who do as it is done now, no trial, execution by batons KOS, only, legally. Mandated, even, by central command officials. In conclusion, I don't feel lowering karma prices will help, I don't feel removing karma will help. Certain races and jobs are gravitated to by certain types not for RP reasons, but for access, abilities, and sometimes allows for them to be the supreme assholes they wish to be. For karma to be effective, I feel jobs and races simply need to be purely RP. TL;DR: chivalry Karma is dead, and the playerbase killed it. But, it honestly wasn't given very good breeding grounds to begin with. Sorry, pal. Somebody has to lose the draw, looks like you are it.

Now, I read the first part, and tried my hand at this. So, I went around pressing ALL of the corpse's I could find, and no license ever appeared. I even pressed the captain a few times, but they woke up. I guess they weren't actually dead. Oops. So, now, I am wondering; should I be pressing any particular part of a corpse? Should I press a corpse more than once? After I press enough corpses, and I get this license to slander, what can I actually do? I didn't actually read that far. Did you hide the secret in the guide, sort of like the rules with the hidden phrase, hairy sea, so people know you read them? I see your ploy. I bet you don't even have to press corpses at all.

Name: Poopsy Commendation: Medal of Robustness, Medal of Bravery Reason: Under the command of myself, the captain, this Clown served as my right hand man in terminating the xenomorphic scum that threatened the greater loss of the lives of the crew, the station, and any research we had achieved. Actions leading to Commendation: Being a strong leader and leading charges of armed personnel in exterminating xenomorphic life forms. Slayed a xenomorphic praetorian with a toolbox. Recommending Person: I, (Zymran Terazed), do solemnly swear the above account is true, made in good faith, and understand that lying upon this commendation is grounds for immediate dismissal from NT and further penalties may apply.

Name: Dongle Honkler Age: 30 Gender: Male Race: Clownish (human) Blood Type: A+ General Occupational Role(s): Clown, assistant, security officer, warden, scientist, HOP, captain. Biography: (for extensive biography, see his book, My Struggle.) A clownish man, began his career rather unskilled as a clown on the NSS Exodus. Although unskilled, his charisma got him -very- far, as it is not uncommon to find Dongle racking up shifts as a captain on the NGS Cyberaid. Being at the bottom of the barrel, he understood his role and place much better than any other counterpart he has faced to date. So, it is no surprise when he adopted the name of the Good Warden, when serving his time in security. In general, he is highly loyal to who ever he befriends first, and is almost always friendly to whoever, no matter the circumstance. Although he may keep his cool, under extreme cases of duress, he will crack, and lash out in fits of drug induced rage. Qualifications: Apprentice Researcher and Developer Master Clown Assisting Most security jobs Command Jobs Employment Records: Security Records: Subject has been spoken to multiple times about how we can't "just all be free with our Dongles", and running around the station under the influence. All other cases of [REDACTED] and [REDACTED] have been expunged, as evidence was faulty at best. Medical Records: Patient has been in and out of medical with many broken bones, and electrical burns all over his body. Most likely from batons and tasers, but the security team declined to comment. The chemists note that the patient has been asking for copious amounts of space lube, and [REDACTED] on a very regular basis. Patient may need to seek counseling and rehabilitation in the near future. Botany declined to comment on if the patient had sought out any forms of [REDACTED] or [REDACTED] for consumption or personal use. Personnel Photo (Appearance text): Commendations [only to be added by admin]: Reprimands [only to be added by admin]: Other Notes:

Alright, let's see if this makes coherent sense when I wake up and read this later (read: in a month from now) So, you want to be a clown, do you? What are you, some kind of captain that thinks they have the crews respect? Ha. Well, you have to start somewhere, don't you? So, let us begin with some basic stuff. To be a good clown, you have to break into the captain's office and be a better captain be friendly and humble. Start off by trying to find out who is cool, and who isn't. You might find friends in cargo, medical, botany, hell, maybe even in security or the Condom themself. The point: find out who can help you, and how. A good friend in cargo can help you get monkeys to replace the security force with competent officers help out the chef. A good friend in chemistry will give you space lube to slip the angry sec officer that you stole the doughnuts from medicine to help out the sick crew. A friend in medical will be there to heal you from sec beating the shit out of you the nice officers asking you a few questions. You want to sort of make a name for yourself as a reliable, helpful, witty, and funny character. This does not mean actually annoying the shit out of everybody until they give you pointless shit you probably don't even know what to do with at this point. So, don't go pestering the HOP or Condom right off the bat for access. You have to work for access. Also, friends will also aid you in more elaborate pranks, aid in your escapes, hide you, or help break you out. Friends are good. So, you got yourself some friends? Well, aint that sweet. Boot up like you are Iraq bound, shits about to get bumpy, Son. No matter what you do, you will always be shat on royally for being the clown. This is a good time to note that as a clown, you have clown genes, and you can't fend for yourself as easily as anybody else on the station. So, your main idea to internalize is: Don't do stupid shit. If it is illegal, don't do it. Will security or anybody else robust you for it? Don't do that. Not yet Ever. Yeah, randomly lubing the halls? Probably Maybe funny for a little bit, but you may even piss off an antag who will might just make you their target, instead of their objective. Well, look at you, now you are cooking with a plasma flame, aren't you? You got yourself some contacts, and you aren't running around with your pants on your head! Head over to the Condom's office and steal ask politely for a medal. Now, is actually time to test your wits. You got yourself some options. These options, they are largely up to the individual, and what that individual may find funny. However, you want to get into or remain in the good graces of the crew, so don't go and piss random people off by slipping them or honking non stop for no reason. Now, keep in mind, you can do a lot, and it is all up to your imagination. Here is some of what I do: If you want to be more straight forward, hidden banana peels can be a great prank, and will often times be ignored. Place a peel in a door under some trash, and watch as everybody goes about their business. Honk as each person goes by, and stomp around in your noisy shoes to increase levels of honkness. Want to be a bit more subtle? Make a chair, grab a pressure tank, close all the doors, release the pressure, and buckle in. This works great in escape hall when people are trying to leave. The doors will open, and everybody will go flying. Honk at the people as they fly away from view. Grab the comfy chair you wanted on the escape shuttle that will no longer be crowded. Have the crew thank you for making the shuttle more peaceful. You did that. They are welcome. Want to be a bit more active in the community? Look for shitcurity officers or any head abusing their power. This will take all of two minutes. Single them out, make an example of them. Rally the crew against those types, and make them the butt of every joke and prank you do. Dress up like them, maybe even get your ID changed to their name, and do exactly what they do, only, honk as you do it. Make jokes about how their significant other ran off with a clown for being way more fun and interesting than they are over public comms. Maybe even write a news story or 20 about them, cheering on their god awful astoundingly good work, and fill it with encouraging words. But, maybe, none of that is for you. No sir, no way, no how. Alright. I hear you. Think about some of this. Sometimes, you may not want to do a prank, maybe you just want to provoke thought. Well, you got all of your friends you made, maybe you can build something with somebody, or maybe make an art piece. You got crayons, and paint, tools, building materials. A well thought out phrase written in crayon can really do it for some people. Maybe you might gather a few clown masks, and have as many people as you can wear them as a show of solidarity. So, now you got some basics going on. Heres all of the other side notes and stuff I think of before I pass out. Clown names. Choose a funny one. A good clown name, Klepto. Or, how about Honkmystium. Be creative. Don't choose an unfunny one, like Dicks, or something. An unfunny clown name I have actually seen: Black History Month. As a clown mentor, I think people can do better. That is just a disgrace to clown players. Races. If you are going to be a non human clown, don't drop all RP of your race to RP the clown. If you are a machine clown, still act as a machine. If you are a slime clown, don't be an annoying twat like most slimes. If you even have the balls to play as a vox clown, well, good luck. You are hated by all. Mimes. You have a perfectly good teammate to start. Be cool to the mime. If you are a mime player and you are reading this, notice how I not once insinuated that the clown should antagonize you. The same goes for you. This is mostly the same guide for both jobs. Gear. There are hosts of cool "secrets" and actual secrets in the clown gear. I am going to only outline some of it, as I like the secrets only a few know, and I like to keep it that way. The PDA can send a honk "virus" to other PDAs. It will cause the target PDA to honk whenever it is used or messaged. The crayon can be eaten, and will never run out. It tastes delicious. Like security tears bananas. Your clown hardsuit is really heavy, and looks kind of bad. Steal Ask politely for the mimes to look more like a bad ass. Well, I ran out of coherent thoughts and ideas. Heres a recap: 1. Don't be a dick. Make friends 2. Don't be stupid 3. Be creative and funny 4. Actually have fun, more so than any other job on the station except for the kid or really creepy angry adult playing security to validate themselves and be something they could never be in real life nice people who wish only to keep the other players safe while they enjoy themselves and be productive members of the station. Honk on, clowns, honk on. Or if you are a mime, be silent. Wave your arms around frantically and somehow tell everybody George Melons is a changling that ate the HOS and robusted the captain. All with your hands, silently. I guess mimes have special genes that allows them to form their fingers into full on paragraphs. Silent Joe motions with his hands as if telling you to read up and post your thoughts, and clear up any confusions you may have. He also wants your ID. Damn, he is silent, Silent Joe. Silent Joe then waves his hands around as if telling you there is a revolution and the barman is a rev head.

Animays? You mean, mayonnaise? I like hellmans, but hell, mayo is mayo. Mangas? You mean, mangos? The ripe kind, cheap, too.

The plague doctor mask should start like this, too.

*Takes an other-worldly deep breathe* Let us begin. From an atag point of view, don't you think your antags are probably really OP? I will expand on this, later. Let us break down the concepts you present some. What seems to be presented is, a mime team to achieve, what, exactly? Killing a single Clown? Any crew member in their right mind that would not want their tongues cut off? Further, Clowns and mimes seem to work together, more often than not, so it may seem, anyway. They are two jobs that almost everybody is fairly split in liking, either one, or the other, rarely both. What seems to be suggested is for mimes and clowns to be pitted against each other, by force, and giving the mime a rather unfair advantage, not only to the clown, but any crew. Clowns have clown genes, they can not use most of any weapons or sec gear with out hurting themselves in some way, shape, or form. So, like any long time clown player would know, the clown finds out "cheats" on how to be fairly robust. Mimes, on the other hand, are normal crew. They can speak, if they so choose, however, if they do, they lose the wall ability, or something rather short lived, if I am not mistaken. Being introduced and taught how to play the game by a mime, as a clown, there is something that doesn't really sit right with me whenever somebody insists that mimes and clowns are meant to kill each other. Especially, when mostly, the real "enemy" to them both, is the security team. Even further, something sort of like this was done once before, and I don't know because I was not around to actually see it, but I do think the mimes killed a fair amount of people, because, lol, imma mime lets kill cluwnes. And for the elephant in the room, this proposition seems to bring almost no opportunity for RP, or so it seems. This is mostly due to the lack of defined goals, or objectives that these mimes would have. TL;DR: giving mimes super powers to kill everybody, or whatever it is you want, is probably a bad idea, and will only be fun for a few people. *Exhales* Side notes: Read up on mime and clown lore in the library. There is already a considerable amount of clown lore, and bits and pieces of mime lore. Perhaps use your imagination and bulk up the lacking bits on either side. Also, I do appreciate the thought and time it must have taken you to conceive the idea, but, who am I but just another player? Also, that being said, don't be discouraged, I am only just another player.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Oo34aqq ... 610132AC68 WH40K Chaos Gate, Ultramarine chants. Hands down, my favourite game. The artwork, the music, the concepts, gameplay. Nostalgia and a half.

Come on man, you have had holding my breathe for the past several hours. The suspense is nerve racking

Aww yeahh, made it in three posts. Read up, the collective ideas need a collective criticism. Kudos to anybody willing to read the full thing and respond in a likewise fashion, if actually needed. More kudos to anybody who reads the full thing, responds in a likewise fashion, but it is not needed.

politely asking you to stop. I am all for "fuck the system" type stuff, but if I find myself in a situation where there is a dick being apprehended by the cops, and they somehow get away, you can bet all of the asses you can fathom that I am going to help those boot stomping head scratchers. Don't be that terminal dick, who every round somebody complains about. How about this, you try to get into the good graces of the whole crew? At a minimum, that's going to be about 35 other crew members. Would you really rather be viewed as super cool by maybe 3 at best other people, and an ultra dick supreme overlord to the rest? And I think that is more than enough for one post, and should probably been made into five. TLDR: 1. make more positions 2. make station bigger 3. don't be a dick

dingbat? Ha!) but they could be, if they had the tasks to kill, and the same gear. Screw the silly outdated relic of a projectile revolver, give em something a bit more new age, a stun revolver, egun, something like that. Now, the gun is new age, but give them something to really remind them of things back on Earth, stomping on peace loving hippies, and bashing the emo goth kids at that club. Give em a beating stick, a baton, but screw the stun batons. If I were a blueshield, and I wanted to stun somebody, I would just look at em with my eyes, and instill the fear of a thousand fallen foes in em. No, the baton is just to crack skulls because they threatened the target you are protecting. Ha! What a silly puny man! You stole the captain's laser and nearly killed them when they were taking a piss? Well, let me show you a thing or two I have learned about batons and the anatomy of an ass hole. Maybe even give blueshields some form of armoury that only activates at red or gamma. I mean, it is all about the profits, so, do you spend extra money on arming the body guards, or do you trust that the money spent on security is enough? It also kind of comes down to bodyguards, vs protector of the workers and station, which is SUPPOSED to be corporate security's job. While we are at it, armouries. Probs needs more guns. Or maybe not. As I mentioned earlier, maybe hire better security guards. If more are hired, train them better, and give them more guns. Don't let it turn out like Russia in WWII, 1 gun per 3 soldiers. How about a journey in the opposite direction? How about a revamp of clowns? More of em. Mimes too. How about if you don't like the stigma of a clown or mime, a jester? Clowns are rather harmless, they have clown genes, so no guns or any of the fun harmful stuff. make the office bigger. Why not? In terms of revamping rooms, how about making the HOP office a -slight- bit more secure. I mean only slightly. One emag and it is all over? Can it be tiny bit more challenging to get to that ID computer I so much like stealing access from? I think for now I have exhausted many of my other points, and they are now coming to a crescendo: The server has grown to an average of 70 people during the day, 100 for a few select hours, and 40 on the down times. Grey tide, when grey tide happens, is lucky to number less than 30. From a business standpoint, that allows for plenty of assistants to learn things from any field they wish to. However, Grey tide usually causes problems, this is usually after there being no opening in any wanted jobs, or the HOP denying a job because of greyshirt status. To cut down on the grey tide, and keep things less crowded, a few areas should be made larger, and more jobs should have the job cap raised. As a few post thoughts: I think a lot of people have forgotten that a lot of things are meant to generate fun. I like the motto of laughter is the best medicine. I do everything IG to generate some laughs. Even as a stoic, stalwart captain or blueshield, I try to keep everything fun for all involved. That is not to say that I succeed every time, sometimes I make things miserable for all involved. The main group to point fingers at are security, and borgs sometimes. Those are just groups as a whole. Think about it, would you want to be brigged for 15 minutes for having a pair of insulated gloves? No, you would want your story heard, and you wouldn't want your game interrupted by some ass hat who won't even utter a word to you until you are bucklecuffed in the brig. This segues into my next point. Don't be a dick. For some people, they will go through life just being a dick, that is unchangeable. If you aren't like that, then don't be a dick unless you absolutely have to, or it is screaming out that it is okay. If your fun has to do with -utterly- stomping all over anothers, you are a dick. Example, banana peels: if shitsec is running after you because you called them hairy ape half breeds, throwing peels at them during the escape is ultra funny. What is not funny: slipping the same people over and over for no reason, especially if they are not trying to fight you off, and are

Well, if I was on the board of directors of NanoTrasen, and/or Central Command, and we had a research station that was worth mind boggling amounts of money, and the primary concern was plasma, then I would want most of the jobs focused on plasma. Further, for the jobs focused on plasma, I would have a lot of positions open for plasma hauls. So, what are we looking at? Mining. No idea at how much plasma is worth, but let's assume that the station and paychecks are covered by the plasma hauls. As far as I know, only two jobs produce plasma: Mining and the slime freaks. Well, slime freak have two job slots at round start? Mining has three. I am no slime freak, so if one could chime in, that would be cool, but I am thinking revamp that area for the possibility of allowing more job slots. Same with mining, a whole station run off of three miners? HA! WUT? Exactly. While we are at it: mining sucks. You get yelled at to get not very abundant minerals for other people to make crazy death lazers and machine god incarnate walkers and other absurd fun things. Once you get them the things they want, you get a shiny new . . . ripley . . . to mine more stuff. Wouldn't a research station start with at least one ripley? Or for that matter, maybe even drills? Not even any good drills, just mining drills. When did we get sent back in time to when we were using picks? In terms of minerals, could the mining rock, clown planet, and prison rock be slightly more abundant? Clown planet is ludicrously filled with all these fun minerals, but it takes 5ever to get there, mine stuff, and get back. A little bit more bananium would be nice, I mean, hey, it is THE Clown planet, right? So, to spice up mining, maybe more abandoned crates or something? I have no idea. Throw some crazy alien death rays and fruity colored hats in those crates. Show those science geeks who really is working for who, and with style. Now, I have been thinking. The station has gotten a lot of players recently, and I want to go about touching upon this subtly as we got through the topics, but I will explain a bit better later. Anyways, I have been thinking, the station has been housing about 70 to 100 workers per shift? And the sec force is a measly, what, maybe a force of 10 total, if you include the hos and warden, and if the detective is being a bad detective and is acting like security? Now, I am not saying that a corporate business machine should be too worried about it's assets so much that they make half of their research vessel security, but only about 10% of the station seems a little low. Further more, which I think would clear up an -obscene- amount of shitsec claims is: get rid of shitsec. Why would a company hire shitty workers that are going to get in the way of profits? They wouldn't. Think of it this way: corporate security officers are not law officers. Security guards are the rentacops you see at venues and in big business buildings. They are paid to keep the place -secure- kind of like the title they hold. NOT get pissy and beat the shit out of employees for saying they ate too many doughnuts. Let's be honest, you ate all the fucking doughnuts. You could have shared. What. An. Asshole. I mean, would a security guard yell at somebody for vandalism? Probably. Detain them? Maybe. As a note, remember that we are in space. The new frontier. "Space Law" is really a ton more like "Nanotrasen Corporate Guidelines". Do you really think any body comes and deals with all of the illegal BS that happens out in space? Entire stations get blown to bits. The only thing protecting the NSS Cyberaid is the Icarus or Luna, or whatever. All about the profits. Anyway, let's see, how about the blueshield? I was thinking maybe revamp the blueshield a bit, and also make the blueshield a bit more available. Say, 5 blueshield slots? One for each head, 6 even, if you want to protect the Rep. Revolver is kind of meh, I think. Difference between corporate security guard and corporate body guard? Security guard is primarily focused on the station, sort of moping around, making sure that the profits are profiting, whatever. As long as they get payed. It isn't like they could have gotten a real job, that you know, requires thinking, or skill. Corporate body guard? Implants. They eat sleep and breathe to protect the people they need to protect. They eat lings and wizards as their pre-breakfast vitamin dose. Now, they aren't death squads, (what the hell is a death squad, what am I, some kind of communist revolutionary

Actually, perhaps another way to look at it, the blue type may be the more bubbly "squish!" types, black or a more dull color could be more of a "meh . . .squish . . ." type.

Yeah, the blue color is an eyesore, and it takes 5ever to get the desired black color as somebody not skilled in xenobiology, especially with obnoxious "coworkers" who aren't the sharpest tools in the shed in terms of social skills.

Can slime people have the choice of color?

Well, damn. Let's do it up.

I concur, however I would have worded it a bit differently. From round start, Hos directly disobeyed every order given by the captain, and at first it was within RP to do so, but then it became blatantly clear that he just wanted the power for himself. Keep in mind that the hos is bound by the loyalty implants, and bound by space law. Also, chain of command is set for a reason. With this in mind, the IAA agent who looked into this was later promoted to hop, as there was a lack of a hop, and was assaulted by the hos. The hos was found to not be an antag.