A Study in Imitating Nubby Nubs. A Guide to Petty Crime.

[Enginseer-42]

Hey there, so I've been a greytiding shit for a few months now, running about. Stealing things that aren't bolted down. Stealing things that ARE bolted down, building shotguns in maint and in general being security's most annoying friend ever.

I'm going to give you four general principles of Petty Crime and what I like to call 'Lesser Antagonism.' I call it that, because you're not a full blown antag, and shouldn't act like one, however your antics do serve as a distraction and smoke screen that might cover an antagonists tracks.

Anyhow. Principle one. And it's the most important principle of the lot.


1.) Security is not your enemy.

But Enginseer! You'll object. This is a guide about petty crime? Shouldn't Shitcurity, who arrests you for doing that, be your enemy? No. And I'll tell you why. As long as you stick to the petty side of petty crime, they're at most a slight nuisance. You might lose a valuable tool (Goodbye my shotgun. Goodbye my vodka bottle full of napalm.) or get brigged for a few minutes. But ultimately, as long as you stick to the role of the petty criminal, they won't go after you too hard. Don't try to act like an antag. Act like a neutral agent. Not quite the law abiding crewmember, but still be willing to put a shotgun slug into a lings face to help an officer in need. You might not be abiding by the law, but you're still a crewmember of the Cyberiad. Act like it.

Anyhow, this is one of the more boring principles but also the most important.

2.) You can get away with a lot if you just ask and act like it's no big deal.

Yes. I have before recieved some insane things, (Bluespace beaker full of Potassium? No problem!) just by asking in a way that seems nonchalant. The stranger you act about something, the more suspicious people will be. You get nothing from fighting or arguing with people. Because that just makes them dig in. Ask, and if you meet resistance, agree and go away and come at the problem from another angle or even just wait and ask someone else for the exact same thing. Or ask for something that sounds less dangerous but really amounts to the same thing. For example, oftentimes scientists will have no problem letting you use the autolathe, but would balk at the idea of giving you shotgun slugs.

3.) The Station is full of pieces that nine tenths of the time won't be missed.

So, the station is big. And with our relatively short round times, there are plenty of times where you can cannibalize parts of the station and no one will even notice, let alone care. For example. Oftentimes you can pull the scrubbers pipes out of sec maintenance and the round will continue as normal as if nothing happened. This isn't ALWAYS the case mind you. But it is more than just possible.  All those chairs and tables scattered around are valuable materials for guns, ammo, and other goodies you'll need as a criminal in the dangerous world of the Cyberiad.

4.) Take Risks. Fortune Favors the Bold.

So, the whole point of playing a criminal character is high risk high reward. You abandon the relative safety of following SoP, take your life into your own hands and hope to space jesus that you don't get merced before you can make it big. Some rounds this approach works. Other rounds you bite the bullet early on. But the important thing is to just keep trying. And think about how you can do better next time. You're already on the bottom, what more is there to lose?

Edited May 25, 2017 by Enginseer-42

[ZN23X]

Reference this guide if you play the game WAY too much yet still continue to play despite how bored you are because you have nothing better to do with your life. Forgot to add the disclaimer about how following this guide will inevitably lead to you getting banned.

[Enginseer-42]

I don't see how it will get you banned? Honestly, the only times I've had admins yell at me was when I WASN'T following this guide. Though I suppose someone following rules 2-4 but not rule 1 could get in trouble.

Rule 1 is important for a reason.

[necaladun]

Can confirm rule 1 is very important.

As a general rule though, remember context is king. Greytiding like this can be bad depending on the situation and the extent. Eg, removing the scrubbers when the AI is filling somewhere full of plasma/people using atmos grenades/etc is bad. 

Always ask yourself if you're making things more fun or just more frustrating for others. Sec need pretty criminals so they have something else to do except hunt antags. No need to be an asshole for them. If you've been greytiding all round, and then scream that you fucked the mother of the guy who arrested you, please don't ahelp if he peppersprays you a bunch or even hits you once with a harmbaton. Sec has a high turnover rate heavily due to people treating them like trash. Try to make it fun for them too! Without security, there'd be no fun in greytiding. 

 

And if in doubt, AHELP first. We might even let you do things you wouldn't normally be allowed to - the admins generally know how chaotic the round is (or about to be).

 

[EvadableMoxie]

30 minutes ago, Enginseer-42 said:

I don't see how it will get you banned?

Your kind of straight up admitting to Self-Antaging and distracting security here:

2 hours ago, Enginseer-42 said:

I'm going to give you four general principles of Petty Crime and what I like to call 'Lesser Antagonism.' I call it that, because you're not a full blown antag, and shouldn't act like one, however your antics do serve as a distraction and smoke screen that might cover an antagonists tracks.
 

Rule 7:

Quote

Actively diverting Security personnel and resources away from an active and direct Antagonist threat in order to deal with you and your actions will be considered Self-Antagging;

I can see how one might feel that a guide that advocates considering yourself a mini-antag and distracting security from actual antags isn't kosher.

 

Outside of that, I have to say that #2 is good advice, regardless of if you are a real antag, mini-antag or loyal NT employee.  Anything you might need someone has access to, and often social engineering is a far better way to get it than brute force.

Edited May 25, 2017 by EvadableMoxie

[Enginseer-42]

And when does my guide advocate that? In fact, my guide directly advocates putting aside any notion of 'shitcurity' to back them up in the event of an active and direct antagonist threat.

The point is that when you break space law while there's nothing going wrong, you get security people wondering if you are an antag, while they are looking into you and what you're up to, they're not paying proper attention to everyone else, giving Antags some breathing room in the beginning of the round.

[SomeGuy9283]

1 hour ago, Enginseer-42 said:

The point is that when you break space law while there's nothing going wrong, you get security people wondering if you are an antag, while they are looking into you and what you're up to, they're not paying proper attention to everyone else, giving Antags some breathing room in the beginning of the round.

I think the issue here is that's not your call to make. The admins will give you plenty of breathing room for shenanigans if you ask them, but going about deliberately trying to distract security is self-antagging, at least to a certain degree. Antagonists are the people designated to spice up the round.

That said: Want to engage in some shady activity? If you have a good IC reason, the admins will more than likely let it slide, but communicating with them and getting approval is key.

[CPTCoffee]

All of this applies unless you are the clown. Clown is always on the radar. 

[ZN23X]

12 hours ago, necaladun said:

Can confirm rule 1 is very important.

Always ask yourself if you're making things more fun or just more frustrating for others. Sec need pretty criminals so they have something else to do except hunt antags. No need to be an asshole for them. If you've been greytiding all round, and then scream that you fucked the mother of the guy who arrested you, please don't ahelp if he peppersprays you a bunch or even hits you once with a harmbaton. Sec has a high turnover rate heavily due to people treating them like trash. Try to make it fun for them too! Without security, there'd be no fun in greytiding.

I can also confirm being a player who primarily works sec that this is all spot on.

I'll admit my first post was covered with salt so here is my more civil response lol

The biggest part of the problem is, most petty criminals DO treat security like garbage. If you don't @Enginseer-42 then you are the rare exception. If you can figure out a way to get the angry teenagers who use the game to project thier hatred for authority to stop, I'd love to hear it.

I like your attitude of "If you get caught, serve your time in the brig and carry on." Nothing you are doing will get you put in perma, and honestly if you aren't kicking and screaming I'm more likely to give you a lesser sentence or even just a warning. I might even "forget" to search your bag and find that shotgun. Wish more "mini antags" had this mindset, it'd make both my life and thier lives easier.

The only part that makes me nervous is "Take risks, fortune favors the bold" because of how it can be interpreted. Ban declines are filled with plenty of Greytiders who kept seeing how far they can push things, how much they can get away with. 50 shades of Greytide 

However, if you have greytided for months without getting in trouble you are obviously doing it the right way. Keep it up, even if just one or two follow suit then you've made things better for everyone. I'd hope you at least understand how players who primarily work sec could look at this post from a negative perspective.

Edited May 26, 2017 by ZN23X

[Birdtalon]

As someone who greytides and also plays security, I have no problem with greytides unless it's for example; a blob or nuclear operatives round. Just have to keep context in mind and if there's a big emergency like Wizard or such then wait until the next round for your greytiding.