Guide to Golemcraft, Goleming and Golemdom

[Display Name]

Golems. Sometimes the pride of the station, usually the worst troublemakers and ruffians. This is the guide to being, creating and utilizing golems.

Golemcraft

A standard Iron Golem, the least unique, and the most tame of the Golem family

Choosing what golems to make, especially when given limited resources, can be the difference between a smashing success and a crushing failure. Thus, here are some words of advice for the general practice of golem creation, both for Xenobiology and the Free Golems.

• Golems have types. These types are extremely important in deciding their utility in different situations.
• Golems are players too, and they will likely not decide to play if they deem the type of golem that has been created to be too vanilla, or too boring. A general rule of thumb is to only create golems with unique abilities, like Bluespace Golems, or ones that are extremely durable, like Diamond Golems, because those are what people want to play.
• Golems may or may not be the blindly loyal assistant(Xenobiology)or the competent new brother(Free Golems), that they are expected to be. Have a contingency plan if the golem's utility doesn't pan out, may it simply be the creation of more golems, or some other means.

Now, onto the actual golem types.

Support Golems:

Support Golems are golems with unique abilities. I'm going to be ranking them with regards to my personal preferences in terms of utility, although each of these can be versatile and capable in their own way.

1. The number one support golem is the adamantium golem. Although they are rarely made by Xenobiology due to the lack of resources, and are limited in number to the Free Golems, their ability to speak and be heard only by other golems is incredibly useful for coordination. Should a Xenobiologist make one, consider using it as a lieutenant of sorts, to keep your creations together.
2. The bluespace golem is only second to the adamanitum golem for the RNG that its abilities employ. Being able to both teleport manually and upon getting hit, similarly to the RD's reactive armor, the bluespace golem is perfect for distractions, escapes, and, if need be, heists.
3. Plasma golems are useful as well. They have an inherent resistance to burn damage, but will blow up if too hot. Coupled with their self-ignite ability, plasma golems serve as a mobile and versatile alternative to conventional IEDs, having the unique quality of being able to chase after something, or someone, that you want to destroy.
4. Although hard to gather resources for, plastic golems have some utility, albeit extremely situational use. Plastic golems can ventcrawl, but only if they do not have a single item on their bodies, with the exception being implants. This makes them most useful as scouts and distractions.
5. Finally, although even more situational, the uranium golem provides yet another circumstancial utility. Every organic within two tiles of a uranium golem immediately takes radiation damage, and may mutate, resulting in a somewhat useful area denial tool, if that is what you need.

Standard Golems:

Standard Golems are standard in that they lack true abilities. They can be used as the rank-and-file of your private army. These are in no particular order.

1. Diamond golems are the jack of all trades, resistant to all damage. They also look pretty cool.
2. Plastitanium golems take little burn damage.
3. Titanium golems take slightly more burn damage.
4. Plasteel golems are slow, but hit harder and get up faster.
5. Gold golems are slightly faster than other golems, but have reduced armour.
6. Silver golems are average, but are immune to magical abilities and stun for longer when punching.
7. Glass golems are immune to and reflect laser projectile, resistant to burn damage, but take significantly increased brute damage and cannot be revived.
8. Sand golems are immune to ballistic projectiles and resistant to brute damage, but take significantly increased burn damage and cannot be revived.

Rare Golems:

Rare Golems are "rare" because, in practice, I have never seen one made and/or are not worth making. These are again in no particular order.

1. Iron golems are vanilla, and boring.
2. Wood golems are weaker on average and die in the darkness.
3. Abductor golems are never made because abductor alloy is hard to find.
4. Bananium golems are never made because bananium is hard to find.
5. Tranquilite golems are never made because tranquilite is hard to find.

 

Goleming

A Plasma Golem, AKA, a walking, ticking IED

In practice, most people are willing to play a loyal servant or a new brother, but here are some general tips and clarifications of such.

• As a golem, you do not need to feign ignorance, as according to the lore, you are souls of the dead, who retain knowledge of their former selves. However, doing so may lead to an enjoyable roleplaying exchange.
• Xenobiology golems are bound to their master. They are to follow their master's orders to a fault, and actively resist doing anything major without direct permission from their master. The master-golem relationship can also be taken through the mediums of borging, transforming and other changes of the master, although it is not mandatory for the golem to continue obeying their master if they give valid IC justification with regards to why the transformed being is not, in fact, their past owner. Golem loyalty must extend to the point at which they are willing to run to their death at the master's behest.
• Golems cannot fire ranged weapons, with the exception being a modified kinetic accelerator. Golems can, however, enter mechs with ranged weaponry.
• Golems, with a few exceptions, are slow. Do not get yourself into a fight that you cannot run away from easily.
• Often, a golem's punch is superior in terms of damage or extra qualities to that of rudimentary melee weapons.
• All golems can hear the resonantion of adamanitum golems.
• Golems, if need be, can transfer themselves into a material-filled shell, killing their previous body. This is useful for switching utilities.
• Golems do not need to breathe and do not take pressure damage, but they do need to eat.
• Golems can be healed with regular medical supplies, with the exception being injections via injector or syringe.
• When gibbed, all golems, with the exception being Sand and Glass Golems, will drop a runic mind.
• All golems are immune to lavaland storms, making it a viable place for them to flee.
• Golems cannot wear items in their mask, gloves, uniform, exosuit and boots slots.
• Golems do not bleed, cannot be dismembered and are immune to radiation.

Specific to the Free Golems.

• The Free Golems are not crew, and while generally not messed with, it is perfectly legal IC for them to be killed. OOC legality is variable, dependent on the situation.
• The Free Golems can create new shells with their special Autolathe.
• The Free Golems start off with several adamantium golems as leaders, and they are vital for communication and survivability.
• The Free Golems start off on lavaland, and can expect to encounter hostile fauna, usually friendly miners and variably friendly lavaland survivors.
• The Free Golems can and will often control the only RnD station outside of the Science Department.

Golemdom

A Bluespace Golem. Can teleport into the Captain's Quarters. Can teleport out of the Captain's Quarters.

So. Instead of finding some friends, you made them instead. No matter, your creations are extremely powerful, and can be utilized in different ways.

1. Golems can be used a hencemen to carry out greytiding your authorized antag objectives. You can easily pin your failed attempts on golems on the counts of a "breakdown of loyalty", them being a "fugitive slave" or them practicing "free will".
2. Golems compliment each other's abilities. Having a coordinated force of resistant and support golems can easily take down other establishments on the station if need be. A uranium golem can passively and actively prevent a door from being opened, while others, immune to the effects of the uranium golem, can go about their business in peace.
3. Golems do not have to breathe. You can easily dispose of bodies around the station by sending them out into the vacuum of space.
4. Golems are immune to a vampire's bite, or a cult's conversion, so having them around as both an extra hand and an immune partner-in-crime can save you a trip to the cloning bay.

Some pratfalls associated with golems

1. Golems are not crew. They are your property, and since you are owned by Nanotrasen via contract, therefore "station property". Any damage done, intentionally or unintentionally to a golem can, at the very most, be considered "damage to station property".
2. Golems are not crew. Anything potentially damaging to the station that they do can, and will, be readily taken as an act of open hostility, and, as such, golems are a favorite among blood-thirsty security teams for executions.
3. Golems do not always listen to commands. They're players, it's understandable. Just try to reason with them, and if it gets too out of hand, ahelp.

 

El fin

As always, give advice/criticism, correct mistakes and suggest information, cheers.

Edit Log:

Addition of Gold Golems to main list - Credit to Garrulous

Golems are liable to virus infection & Plastic Golems can still vent crawl if they have implants(Storage, Mindslave, etc.) - Credit to BeanOS

Edited November 25, 2019 by Display Name

[Comet Blaze]

Nice guide, I like how all of the golems are mentioned. Praise be the liberator!

[Garrulous]

Do not forget the wonderful gold golem, with the much sought after ability of not being as slow as a normal golem.

[Display Name]

22 hours ago, Garrulous said:

Do not forget the wonderful gold golem, with the much sought after ability of not being as slow as a normal golem.

Thanks! Added.

[BeanOS]

Golems are now actually vulnerable to viruses.

[BeanOS]

Also Plastic Golems can still vent crawl if they have implants.

[TheMaveran]

Worth mentioning, that in the event Alien Golems ARE able to be made, they are probably the strongest. Their regeneration is outright insane, like diona on steroids.