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[Warning some aspects of the story may be exaggerated or completely untrue for the favor of the narrative, but it is all based on a true story]

 

My office?  dingy smelling of cheap pest spray dirty and the lights keep flickering  like the office of any detective worth his salt.

On my desk the usual: A deck of cards, Donuts, Coffee and my trusty 38.  Yep this was yet an other night shift had begun in the station that never sleeps.
If only i listened to my chief instructor and got that fancy position at a TSF diplomatic station,  but no i wanted adventures, i wanted thrills and signed up with NT to join a backwater research station in the cross-section  of fuck all nowhere,  the syndicates sphere of influence, and the hub of weird space. A fuck tone of things happening at all times but i get no money, no sleep and no friends.  
If that ain't enough  of the little people that are not complete Psychos on this station and i can be friends  they all end up dead.

But you see i had to give it all for the prospects of endless adventure.

*Biiing*  My inside monologue interrupted all suddenly by a ring on the door,  could that be a new case for me?

The door opens automatically,  and i am greeted  by a warm thick russian accent.  "Detective i have a case for you" 

It was this shifts head of security a tall muscular blue eyed and bald Russian human with a face so hard that it could kill a bear,  yet elegant and well put together.  A man feared all around the station yet a man misunderstood, The truth behind that tough exterior was a gentle caring soul, a soul that cares for its subordinates, a soul meant to lead with nothing more but persuasion alone.

I simply responded " And what could that be chief?"

Chief informed told me to keep near medbay, because he had a bad hunch today one of the new MD's did not seem right to him,  not the one to question his instinct i complied, grabbing my hat and scarf off the cloths hanger and leaving my 38 on the table and locking down, It was green after all.

I arrive at the bar, the best way to keep my eyes around medbay was by being near it but not being obvious, or at least that would be my excuse to relax on the job. I ordered my usual favorite, a mug half chocolate half cream and topped with candy corn stirred not shaken punpun know exactly how to make it,  its the only little joy that i get these days, a man must have his vices. I take my drink leave punpun a handsome tip and sit to the thin table in the left corner of the bar,  my newspaper there waiting for me.
I start reading it intently all the wile taking slow sips of my drink. Apparently one Mr.Changs corporation stations was busted by some small planet government for major trafficking of illegal substances,  shame to changs food was my favorite as a kid, its the the food of the true dyson sphere resident,  its quick its cheap and you can eat it wile walking from point a to b.

Suddenly a figure sits down on the chair opposed to mine, i lower my newspaper slightly and take a look,  Its a vulpakin lady with thick black fur, brown eyes and a fluffy tail in some sort of anime inspired witch costume. with a slight smirk she begins to speak.

"Hello detective."

"Hello, how can i help you?"

" I am reporter <Name Redacted>, we have worked together before when i was writing an article on the minds of criminals and i was thinking if in this shift i could come with you and work as your assistant ive really been interested in criminology since our last meeting. 

-I raise my newspaper back up dismissively and say- "Forget it toots its too dangerous,  besides its against sop and no detective would take someone with no degree or training to a related to the field as an apprentice in any serious stations"

I hear the ever so familiar sound of money being layed on the table, i knew it even if my newspaper was obscuring the view. 

"Detective, i am quite keen on this and some green can change your mind both of us know you need it,  Besides both of us know this is not a serious station detective."  Even with out seeing her i knew her mischievous smirk intensified after laying it on the poor detective.

I sighed and lowered my newspaper to take a look at how big the stack of money was. "Look toots you know i need the money, i just can't say no to your offer when you put it like that but on one condition you get rid of that ridiculous dress and put something accordingly for a detective."  How bad could this be i am lonely and broke  i will have some probably sane company for a shift wile i also fill my pocket.

She gives a nod and smiles,  I gulp down the rest of my drink put the stack of money in my pocket  and we head back to my office.

We walk in and i open my closet of fancy detective  clothes tell the lady to suit her self and return to my office chair, looking away as she is eagerly changing attire but i can't help but catch a short glimpse.  Dawning a  fancy shirt, formal pants, one of my leather coats and a brown fedora she is ready and excited as all hell.  Right after she gets dressed i get a call on the radio to investigate blood in medmaints,   I and my new assistant head out for the crime scene.
Once we are there i begin to examine for blood and prints wile she is taking pictures and writing notes right behind me, I consistently find the prints of some dick, specifically a civilian going by the name Flick Dick.  Me and my assistant are talking theories and taking notes until we hear the sound of commotion within the medbay. We charge in there and we catch a glimpse of Flick Dick behind a window with a double-e-sword butchering some poor man. 

I yell "STOP IN THE NAME OF THE LAW"   and Flick Dick runs away in an inhumane speed.  Well our job was done here, we had the name of the criminal we just had to set them to arrest and write a report.  And security would handle it.   So we went back to my office and did exactly that.  Then we started playing blackjack wile talking about the work of a detective  to pass the time wile waiting for our next lead.

In the radio we hear the ai calling for all officers to raid cargo  wile also notifying of flick dick being in surgery room two, And the RD yelling about sings of brake in on the gas storage room. Knowing  we were strained right then i grabbed my 38 from my desk and handed my assistant my evidence scanner telling her to investigate the  gas storage brake in wile i would go to grab Flick Dick,   she gave my a concerned look and nodded and started running to medbay.   Ai opened all doors as i arrived quickly and i am in the surgery room  under the impression my suspect is sleeping and try to cuff him,  He gets up and stuns me with a home made cattle prod,  then quickly goes for my cuffs and attempts to cuff me, I take a step back and start fireing  two bullets hit,   then the operating doctor steps in trips me and quickly takes him out back,  After i get back on my feet with my revolver in hand i run to the other side  and begin chasing the blood trail he left as his surgery was not done and my bullets couldn't have been much help to his bleeding either.
I chase him to maints  and start firing  shots at his hiding spot, but then suddenly he makes his holoparasite appear  and i am bombarded by a stream of green shards and have to withdraw and go get treated in medical. 

One the doctor tells me i am patched up i hear two calls on the radio,   The head of security is being murdered at the dorms by escaped prisoners,   but my assistant is being kidnaped by Flick Dick in arrivals wile he was taunting me over the radio and telling me he would kill her if i did not come.  With hesitation and sweat at this point i had to grit my teeth and choose between my assistant and the future of the station, the station would not survive with out hos and i could hope to my heart of hearts that an officer would respond to my assistants call besides i am sure going to flick dick would be a trap for me.
I rush quickly to the dorms and spot hos being beaten in the pool, i fire my revolver at the savages until the start running away, don't bring an e-dagger to a gun fight, quickly retrieved the chief and take him to medbay. Then i bolted for disposals with the weight of the world on my shoulder and a pounding in my heart, once i arrived i realized it was too late,  The body of my assistant beheaded and with the brain missing, It wouldn't take a detective to tell the brain was probably grinded to a pulp in the recycling machine but i wanted to believe, i wanted to hope. Such a waste, and it was all on me, I shouldn't have taken that bribe and let a reporter play the role of a detective, what was i thinking? besides everyone that gets close to me seems to have a bad end with my fucking record.   Why do i always have to be lonely can't this station just let me have  a friend that doesn't die?

With a reverse grim in my face i started slowly walking to cargo,  i knew what had to be done, there is no better motivation other then revenge, wile i did not know <NameRedacted> too well i was sick and tired of losing potential friends.   I had to defend my family name and take full life consequences.  No matter what happened i had to take that Dick flicker down if it was the last thing i did. At cargo i modify my 38 to 307 and grab 3 speed loaders of rounds.  Next time i would be ready.

I go to the bar to skulk about my shitty life and get my second or even third Creamy Chocolate with candy corn.  My diet or my wallet were no longer a concern i just wanted to num the pain away.  I am on my 5th bottle until on the radio i hear the words i was waiting,  "FLICK DICK AT Engineering hallway" I drop my drink and pull my gun, it was time to face the villain and save the station from this threat because i don't know how to deal with my feelings and dumb heroism is the only way i know to deal with my reality.  I walk confidently down the hallway until i meet eyes with Flick Dick.

I shouted  "FLICK DICK  YOU CAN FUCK ME BUT WHEN YOU FUCK MY ASSISTANT ILL FUCK YOU WITH NO ROOM FOR DIPLOMACY"

He responded "So be it sleuth you saw what i did to your assistant and your colleges we will be seeing who will be fuck who"

But before he finished his sentence i had put two bullets in him. 

His holoparasite comes out  and fires a hale of shards at me,  i doge and get an other shot,

He pulls out a grenade and primes it ready to throw at me,   I take an other shot and its my lucky brake  he falls down.

The hale of shards is starting to hit  me but i don't back down i fire two more shots and one of them hits the holoparasite wile the other misses.

The grenade explodes causing a small breach  and setting him and the surrounding area on fire.

With no hesitation or doubts i walk into the fire to get closer wile also getting hit by shards   taking an other shot it hits. My body is on fire but on my mind is only two things, How cool i look doing this and the death of my friend.

I reload my gun,  by that time there are reinforcements from all sides also shooting Flick Dick with  lasers. i take two more steps throw the fire and shard hale and fire two more shoots directly at his head.

The holoparasite disappears,  i fire ony more shot at his head and go for more but my revolver explodes in my hand and i fall down.

This is it i did it i saved the station  the storm has raged and its over,  My emotional pain almost helps to dull the pain of being on fire and impaled with a fucktone of shards.

I want to rest,  i fall down and the world around begins to spin and slowly fade.

I wake up outside a cryo-revival tube in the hospital,  my boss is the first thing i see.

"Did we find it hos? her brain? my assistants brain, tell me Flick Dick had it on him."

"Sleuth..."

"Tell that she is not permanently dead hos."

"Sleuth.."

"Tell me hos please tell me she is alright"

"Sleuth, thank you for your sacrifice..., and thank you for your service to the station and me...,"

"Oh god i was right that sick bastard grinded her brain to a smoothie"

"Look Sleuth, i sincerely Thank you, it must have been having to choose the way you did, i am sorry for what you had to go through."

"I should have chosen the diplomacy TSF satellite but i wouldn't listen chief, i wouldn't listen"

"Sleuth, you can have the rest of the shift off.  You went through a lot,  Here is my number, when we get back to central give me a call if you need a friend or maybe even more then that.  Thank you again for service sleuth and thank you for saving me."

The chief left wile i layed down on the floor for a bit to regain my bearings and get back up.   After i did that i went straight to the bar, but even so there was not enough candy corn in the bar to deal with my trauma.  There ain't enough candy cane in the world to deal with my trauma. 

 

 

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