How I Met Steve, King of Clowns

[IamnotDave]

 

(Be aware this is an edited version of a story a posted to the subreddit)

 

This is a story written from an old round, as my Engineer/Scientist/Research-guy. The beginning of the round I'll skip over, I did the solars, heard a murder, say a guy explode after reading the Shrekoning and eventually went through the gateway to they Clown Planet with Steve, the future king, a miner who's name I can't remember and the chaplain. We explored the aftermath of the Clown-Mime war, we saw bodies, Mimes and Clowns, littered all over the planet, sadly I couldn't repair the mechs.

Eventually, I managed to get lost, but I found the miner after a long while of searching, he informed me the chaplain attacked him and couldn't be trusted. We managed to loot the mime bar for crossbows and baguette ammo, but were attacked by bats, I had my hardsuit off and they managed to break several of my ribs before the miner fought them off with his drill. Every time I took a step the ribs in my torso moved, leaving me in extreme pain.

As I stumbled back to the bar I asked the miner to stay with me while we call for help, then there was a response on the miners radio, Steve! That beautiful, beautiful clown! We informed him of our location and he said he was coming. During that time a quartermaster by the name of Yuri who was also attacked by the chaplain (allegedly) came in. Then after a while I started recovering from the pain slowly, slowly, but surely.

Then after a while Steve arrived, dressed with a golden crown and rainbow cloak. He informed us of his journey to his ancestor's tomb where he discovered he was the child of the Honkmother and Captain Kirk. We all saluted or bowed to his authority.

After wandering for a few minutes and two PDA tests I was to sore to walk, so Steve, in all his glory and kindness, carried me around. The Yuri betrayed us, he said the miner attacked the chaplain and kidnapped the miner. The chase was unsuccessful due to a loud screech from somewhere. After hiding out in the bar to recover, me and Steve traveled back to where our adventure began, and I prayed to the Honkmother for healing. There we found my friend who I messaged on my PDA, an officer and some others who were attempting to escape an eldrich monster who was summoned by a cult on the station: Nar' Sie.

With our spirits raised we attempted to contact a surgeon to save me from my near inevitable death. Then the round ended. I like to think we saved the miner, my prayer was answered and we started a village on the clown planet. There you have it, how I came to meet Steve, King of Clowns.