Being the Head of Security in a Revolution Round.

[Westhybrid]

 

Okay, kids. Story numero uno. Let's go back in time to 2014.

 

I'm Head of Security, and I've been verbally abused in this occupation enough to register finally that this shift I don't feel like fucking up. There's not a lot of people in Station Sec tonight. Me, a brig physician and a comatose detective. Looks like I'm on patrol.

 

It's maybe five minutes into the shift. No big deal, I'm just strolling along. Mostly quiet. I decide to visit Medbay, thinking, "what the fuck could go wrong here." Plenty. I decide to go into the Security checkpoint(back when we had a Security checkpoint), and mull things over before the clown was inevitably violated. Outside my door in the inner parts of medbay, I see a crewmember doing something strange. Looks like a normal greytide. I open my door, asking what the hell he's up to. He stares at me.

 

~He's just staring. He's not saying shit. Why isn't he saying anything.~

 

Greytide A, as he will be further referred to, goes up and tries to disarm me. Jokes on him, my hands are empty. Not wanting to initiate the very fickle switch in the HoS's mind that reads "break his spine claim ignorance of law and brig for infinity," I give him the benefit of the doubt and say, "Hey pal, I need you to take a step back." Greytide A pushes me back into the security checkpoint. Now I am disgruntled. I take my baton out to show him I mean busines-

 

He knocks me down and takes my baton. By badge of honor stolen by a man in a gray jumpsuit wearing a bear head, I am now beginning to suspect some shit may be awry. He begins to pull out zipties.

 

Now, at this point, I realize two possible things are happening. Either Taken 4 is being filmed and I have been grossly uninformed about my role or I am about to be culted or killed or have my face stolen.

 

I get up, leaving my baton in his filthy greytide hands, like he is a common farmhand who just stole Excalibur. I manage to push him out back behind the security door through sheer luck and panic. I think, ~He doesn't have access. I'm good. I can call this in to my brig doc and Vege-tective and call it a day.~

 

He has stolen my headset without my realizing it. Even my sprite shows shame.

 

More doctors show up outside the security-medbay office. I yell at them, "hey, there's a lunatic that stole my shit, be careful, and get help."

 

They are not saying anything.

 

They're gathering outside and not saying anything.

 

What is this Children of the Corn bullshit.

 

As one of them tries to climb over the security desk, I open the door, crack one of the doctors in the head and make a mad dash back to Station Sec. I close myself behind the doors of Station Sec, finding a homely feeling with my disconcerned brig-doc and my unconscious detective.

 

**WARNING, A LEVEL 5 BIOHAZARD BLAH BLAH BLAH.**

 

The Revolutionaries own Virology. They have released a virus that makes people emit plasma. I feel like I am in a chess game with the CDC.

 

I try to explain to the crew through the loudspeaker that Revolutionaries had made an attempt on my life. The greytides claimed I was "the man" trying to "keep them down." .

 

Fast forward about 25 minutes. In that time, they have managed to take control of Medbay, R&D and most of the eastern side of the Station. Captain's dead, go figure. CMO was never there. Research Director dipped off the his fucking space-island resort. Chief Engineer hiding. HoP non-existent. I am the last goddamn Head on a station of people wanting to kill Heads.

 

I discover from my completely welded Security bunker that the only department not compromised is Cargo. Apparently no one visited them. They had no idea shit had hit the fan. They were still ordering Corgi crates and loving life. I praised their ignorance as bliss and told them to lock the fucking doors.

 

 

A beacon of hope arrives on station. We hadn't had a new arrival for a long while. Some medical doctor with competence. (Probably Heather Somna. That woman is the patron saint of space healing.)

 

I immediately PDA her the situation and tell her I need off this hellhole. She arrives, puts me in a locker, and I sit there like I'm about to be smuggled across the border of some forlorn country. I explain to her Cargo are the real MVP, and she drags me down the hallway to Cargonian safety. Along the way, we are stopped by one of the chump greytides who was rounding up anyone who hadn't said "Fuck the system" yet. My doctor friend tried to explain the situation. I was clutching my telescopic baton with harm intent. I felt like Anne Frank.

 

Greytide B opens that locker, and I drop out of it like Ghostface from Scream, beating the everloving shit out of him before he stops talking and the Doctor closes the locker again, walking on like nothing happened. I've never committed a drive-by from a medical locker in my life.

 

We get to cargo, a guy from mining opens it up. He kindly gets us through cargo to mining, the revolutionaries close on our tail. The CMO arrives on the station, and the Doctor goes back to arrivals to get him to Mining. We have now formed the Underground Railroad, and the Doctor is now some sort of space-Harriet Tubman.

 

I'm on the Mining Station now, with the Miner. He's showing me around the place, giving me a room. I feel like I'm being treated right at a Best Western. He starts acting funny. ~What the fuck now.~ I think. Says he needs a doctor. ~Why.~ I think.

 

**WARNING, A LEVEL 5 BIOHAZARD**

 

Plasma starts filling the room. I have no access to these mining doors as we both start to suffocate and die from toxin damage. I have survived crazed lunatics and undergone an hour and a half shift in blatant fear only to be subdued by some asshole's plasma flatulence.

 

My death alarm goes off, most certainly letting the Doctor know her efforts were in vain. I go off into the graveyard in righteous rage, mad about my stun baton and resentful of the existence of the Virology department.

 

[KasparoVv]

 

If he was a miner he probably should've had internals

Don't we get emergency internals in boxes, too?

 

Either way, wicked story. Crazy Rev shenanigans.

 

[Allfd]

A good story, thank you for sharing!

[James009]

A very fun story, thanks for sharing.

[Sausagewater]

Very nice story , a good hos like you is needed in those rounds , shame you didt have some forces to fight back.

[Taedra]

Drive by locker. 10/10 new weapon of choice found.

[Shadeykins]

 

Hahaha! Drive-by locker.

 

I did that once in a changeling round, where I found a syndicake (I think it was Tully) and made a deal with him to help each other out, and he lured in a security guard by refusing a random search to a locker I was hiding in.

 

Good times were had, we almost got Julius Blackthorn too! <3

 

[NTSAM]

 

 

 

 

You, good man, know how to tell a story. All my applause.

Also, yeah, jumping out of closets and taking a hostile unexpectedly is beast. I find a well timed *scream or *buzz just before the attack adds to the "OH SHIT" effect ever so slightly. (Maybe in a few cases humorously?)