A Pollock of Ideas and Rants. (TLDR:revamps, don't be a dick

[Hairy Ban Jhankri]

 

Well, if I was on the board of directors of NanoTrasen, and/or Central Command, and we had a research station that was worth mind boggling amounts of money, and the primary concern was plasma, then I would want most of the jobs focused on plasma. Further, for the jobs focused on plasma, I would have a lot of positions open for plasma hauls. So, what are we looking at? Mining.

 

No idea at how much plasma is worth, but let's assume that the station and paychecks are covered by the plasma hauls. As far as I know, only two jobs produce plasma: Mining and the slime freaks. Well, slime freak have two job slots at round start? Mining has three. I am no slime freak, so if one could chime in, that would be cool, but I am thinking revamp that area for the possibility of allowing more job slots. Same with mining, a whole station run off of three miners? HA! WUT? Exactly.

 

While we are at it: mining sucks. You get yelled at to get not very abundant minerals for other people to make crazy death lazers and machine god incarnate walkers and other absurd fun things. Once you get them the things they want, you get a shiny new . . . ripley . . . to mine more stuff. Wouldn't a research station start with at least one ripley? Or for that matter, maybe even drills? Not even any good drills, just mining drills. When did we get sent back in time to when we were using picks? In terms of minerals, could the mining rock, clown planet, and prison rock be slightly more abundant? Clown planet is ludicrously filled with all these fun minerals, but it takes 5ever to get there, mine stuff, and get back. A little bit more bananium would be nice, I mean, hey, it is THE Clown planet, right? So, to spice up mining, maybe more abandoned crates or something? I have no idea. Throw some crazy alien death rays and fruity colored hats in those crates. Show those science geeks who really is working for who, and with style.

 

Now, I have been thinking. The station has gotten a lot of players recently, and I want to go about touching upon this subtly as we got through the topics, but I will explain a bit better later. Anyways, I have been thinking, the station has been housing about 70 to 100 workers per shift? And the sec force is a measly, what, maybe a force of 10 total, if you include the hos and warden, and if the detective is being a bad detective and is acting like security? Now, I am not saying that a corporate business machine should be too worried about it's assets so much that they make half of their research vessel security, but only about 10% of the station seems a little low. Further more, which I think would clear up an -obscene- amount of shitsec claims is: get rid of shitsec. Why would a company hire shitty workers that are going to get in the way of profits? They wouldn't.

 

Think of it this way: corporate security officers are not law officers. Security guards are the rentacops you see at venues and in big business buildings. They are paid to keep the place -secure- kind of like the title they hold. NOT get pissy and beat the shit out of employees for saying they ate too many doughnuts. Let's be honest, you ate all the fucking doughnuts. You could have shared. What. An. Asshole. I mean, would a security guard yell at somebody for vandalism? Probably. Detain them? Maybe. As a note, remember that we are in space. The new frontier. "Space Law" is really a ton more like "Nanotrasen Corporate Guidelines". Do you really think any body comes and deals with all of the illegal BS that happens out in space? Entire stations get blown to bits. The only thing protecting the NSS Cyberaid is the Icarus or Luna, or whatever. All about the profits.

 

Anyway, let's see, how about the blueshield? I was thinking maybe revamp the blueshield a bit, and also make the blueshield a bit more available. Say, 5 blueshield slots? One for each head, 6 even, if you want to protect the Rep. Revolver is kind of meh, I think. Difference between corporate security guard and corporate body guard? Security guard is primarily focused on the station, sort of moping around, making sure that the profits are profiting, whatever. As long as they get payed. It isn't like they could have gotten a real job, that you know, requires thinking, or skill. Corporate body guard? Implants. They eat sleep and breathe to protect the people they need to protect. They eat lings and wizards as their pre-breakfast vitamin dose. Now, they aren't death squads, (what the hell is a death squad, what am I, some kind of communist revolutionary

 

[Hairy Ban Jhankri]

 

dingbat? Ha!) but they could be, if they had the tasks to kill, and the same gear. Screw the silly outdated relic of a projectile revolver, give em something a bit more new age, a stun revolver, egun, something like that. Now, the gun is new age, but give them something to really remind them of things back on Earth, stomping on peace loving hippies, and bashing the emo goth kids at that club. Give em a beating stick, a baton, but screw the stun batons. If I were a blueshield, and I wanted to stun somebody, I would just look at em with my eyes, and instill the fear of a thousand fallen foes in em. No, the baton is just to crack skulls because they threatened the target you are protecting. Ha! What a silly puny man! You stole the captain's laser and nearly killed them when they were taking a piss? Well, let me show you a thing or two I have learned about batons and the anatomy of an ass hole. Maybe even give blueshields some form of armoury that only activates at red or gamma. I mean, it is all about the profits, so, do you spend extra money on arming the body guards, or do you trust that the money spent on security is enough? It also kind of comes down to bodyguards, vs protector of the workers and station, which is SUPPOSED to be corporate security's job.

 

While we are at it, armouries. Probs needs more guns. Or maybe not. As I mentioned earlier, maybe hire better security guards. If more are hired, train them better, and give them more guns. Don't let it turn out like Russia in WWII, 1 gun per 3 soldiers.

 

How about a journey in the opposite direction? How about a revamp of clowns? More of em. Mimes too. How about if you don't like the stigma of a clown or mime, a jester? Clowns are rather harmless, they have clown genes, so no guns or any of the fun harmful stuff. make the office bigger. Why not?

 

In terms of revamping rooms, how about making the HOP office a -slight- bit more secure. I mean only slightly. One emag and it is all over? Can it be tiny bit more challenging to get to that ID computer I so much like stealing access from?

 

I think for now I have exhausted many of my other points, and they are now coming to a crescendo: The server has grown to an average of 70 people during the day, 100 for a few select hours, and 40 on the down times. Grey tide, when grey tide happens, is lucky to number less than 30. From a business standpoint, that allows for plenty of assistants to learn things from any field they wish to. However, Grey tide usually causes problems, this is usually after there being no opening in any wanted jobs, or the HOP denying a job because of greyshirt status. To cut down on the grey tide, and keep things less crowded, a few areas should be made larger, and more jobs should have the job cap raised.

 

As a few post thoughts:

 

I think a lot of people have forgotten that a lot of things are meant to generate fun. I like the motto of laughter is the best medicine. I do everything IG to generate some laughs. Even as a stoic, stalwart captain or blueshield, I try to keep everything fun for all involved. That is not to say that I succeed every time, sometimes I make things miserable for all involved. The main group to point fingers at are security, and borgs sometimes. Those are just groups as a whole. Think about it, would you want to be brigged for 15 minutes for having a pair of insulated gloves? No, you would want your story heard, and you wouldn't want your game interrupted by some ass hat who won't even utter a word to you until you are bucklecuffed in the brig. This segues into my next point.

 

Don't be a dick. For some people, they will go through life just being a dick, that is unchangeable. If you aren't like that, then don't be a dick unless you absolutely have to, or it is screaming out that it is okay. If your fun has to do with -utterly- stomping all over anothers, you are a dick. Example, banana peels: if shitsec is running after you because you called them hairy ape half breeds, throwing peels at them during the escape is ultra funny. What is not funny: slipping the same people over and over for no reason, especially if they are not trying to fight you off, and are

 

[Hairy Ban Jhankri]

 

politely asking you to stop. I am all for "fuck the system" type stuff, but if I find myself in a situation where there is a dick being apprehended by the cops, and they somehow get away, you can bet all of the asses you can fathom that I am going to help those boot stomping head scratchers. Don't be that terminal dick, who every round somebody complains about. How about this, you try to get into the good graces of the whole crew? At a minimum, that's going to be about 35 other crew members. Would you really rather be viewed as super cool by maybe 3 at best other people, and an ultra dick supreme overlord to the rest?

 

And I think that is more than enough for one post, and should probably been made into five.

 

TLDR:

1. make more positions

2. make station bigger

3. don't be a dick

 

[Hairy Ban Jhankri]

Aww yeahh, made it in three posts. Read up, the collective ideas need a collective criticism. Kudos to anybody willing to read the full thing and respond in a likewise fashion, if actually needed. More kudos to anybody who reads the full thing, responds in a likewise fashion, but it is not needed.

[Roland410]

 

I have read it all, but I need a keyboard to respond, so wait for me to get home.

 

Keyboard:

So, I read it all as I said, and I do find it really great, not sure about the number of blueshields, but we really need more job slots and some upgrades for mining. For an instance, mining got gibtonite, but who uses it the proper way, like ever? Personally the clown planet should only have bananium, and no artifacts, xenoarch is partially ruined by that, and abandoned crates, yes we need more.

 

About the station, I think we should invest some time and sweat into a new map or get a lot bigger from another server. We tend to be full on the map, and it's really bad, and it would be just great with more job slots in general. The HoP room is quite easy to break into, indeed, but it's the easiest to get caught in.

 

Armoury? Too few guns right now, it really needs more, like a LOT more. Possibly armors too, it would be logical to equip people with armors when they have guns.

 

Greytide has a scaling which is enabled, and if a lot of people are doing actual jobs, then more greytide can come.

 

Possibly forgot a lot of stuff but TL;DR, I totally agree with you.

 

Edited March 12, 2014 by Guest

[Hairy Ban Jhankri]

Come on man, you have had holding my breathe for the past several hours. The suspense is nerve racking

[Sheakhan]

 

Alright brah, heres the deal.

 

1. In response to the request for more miners, plasma researchers and the like... NT is notorious for being a SHITTY business. They are at the top of the food chain because nobody else can compete due to circumstance, not entirely skill and ability. The station does pull in plasma, but it is primarily a research station, hence virology, xenobiology, R&D, science, genetics, and medbay (those fuckers ARE the experiment).

2. It is widely known that NT hires shit workers to work a shit station for shit pay. Why would they care overly much about security? The point of SS13 is to revel in gross incompetence and the fun that arises, not to streamline it so everyone is immaculate and perfect at their jobs. Fuck ups are funny!

3. I forgot 3.

 

[Roland410]

 

Fuck ups are funny!

 

WHO LET THE SINGULO LOOSE?

 

[Sheakhan]

honk