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Le Shitcurity
Welcome to Le Shitcurity
Where incompetence meets refinement and chaos turns into an art form. Delve into our meticulously crafted menu that epitomizes the essence of SS13's unforgettable Shitcurity department. Please be advised, our offerings are intentionally tongue-in-cheek, and any resemblance to actual security establishments is purely coincidental.
Amuse-Bouches
| Menu Item |
Description |
| Slippery Prelude |
A dance of sliced truffles and delicate banana leaves, evoking missteps and laughter in every bite. |
| Keycard Sonata |
An orchestration of keycards, each presenting a symphony of surprise. Revel in the thrill of searching for the elusive melody. |
| Espresso Rhapsody |
A melodious espresso-infused concoction, with whimsical temperatures that dance upon your palate. |
Plats Principaux
| Menu Item |
Description |
| Contraband Symphony |
An opulent arrangement of forbidden delicacies artfully smuggled, teasing your senses and challenging your detective skills. |
| Interrogation Étude |
A captivating composition of unconventional methods. Expect rubber ducks, dramatic monologues, and a sprinkle of good cop, bad cop. |
| La Surprise de Perma-Brig |
A symphony of flavors served with silver shackles, offering an extended journey of introspection within the brig's confinements. |
Desserts
| Menu Item |
Description |
| Jailbreak Fantasia |
An enchanting finale of an ethereal sundae crowned with shards of caramelized chaos, allowing the brave to savor liberation. |
| Sec's Secret Delice |
A clandestine dessert, known only to our maître d'hôtel. Its recipe a well-guarded secret, teasing palates with enigmatic allure. |
| Confiscated Confections |
Gourmet cookies, intercepted from dubious characters. Sample the forbidden pleasure of illicitly acquired sweetness. |
Thank you for gracing us with your presence at Le Shitcurity. We trust that your dining experience will be an exquisite amalgamation of sophistication and humor. Our dedicated staff is here to ensure every morsel delights your palate, while the subtle undercurrent of chaos keeps you pleasantly intrigued. Bon appétit!